Many people believe that social networking sites have had a huge negative atibe impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree.

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In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
recent
year
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years
show examples
, the usage of social media platforms
is
Wrong verb form
has been
show examples
constantly on the rise. The
argument
that these
sites
bring many negative
effects
to
user
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users
show examples
of them is an
argument
that is
both agreed and disagreed with by many. The two sides of
this
argument
will be thoroughly analysed and discussed in
this
essay before drawing a reasoned conclusion.
Firstly
, the
advantacement
Correct your spelling
advancement
rate at which social networking
sites
provide a
wide-range
Correct your spelling
wide range
show examples
of
connection
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connections
show examples
to everyone around the world is quite remarkable.
For instance
, one can talk to their relatives from every
corners
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corner
show examples
of the globe without any gap of
connection
via a strong and stable network that these
sites
provided
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provide
show examples
to the end users.
Furthermore
, not only a conversation can be covered by these pages, social networks are a tool to
delivery
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deliver
show examples
news,
sent
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send
show examples
information and many
others form
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other forms
show examples
of data to everyone in their network.
As a result
, anyone joined these social
sites
can
received
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receive
show examples
updated news at instance, talk to anyone from anywhere, and have a virtual space where they can store whatever they want.
Nevertheless
, social applications, as convenient as they are,
also
have many major drawbacks that need to be considered carefully.
Firstly
and foremost, there are many misinformation cases that these pages are providing to their readers
everyday
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every day
show examples
via the speed of
Internet
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the Internet
show examples
.
For example
, unlike traditional newspapers where posts are carefully checked and censored, Facebook
allowed
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allows
show examples
its
user
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users
show examples
to spread any falsy information quickly via a personal post and
this
post
continue
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continues
show examples
to be shared
to
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with
show examples
many
others reader
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other readers
show examples
within
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with
show examples
a click of
button
Add an article
a button
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, which can cause many harmful
effects
on the society.
Additionally
, with the growth of virtual
connection
via smartphones, people nowadays are no longer
interesting
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interested
show examples
in face-to-face interaction as they are
heavely
Correct your spelling
heavily
depended
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dependent
show examples
on
the
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apply
show examples
social technology
connection
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connections
show examples
.
Therefore
,
this
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
it clear that social networks are bringing many negative impacts to humanity over their advantages. To
sumarise
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summarise
summarize
, the two sides of the
argument
concerning
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concern
show examples
prospects
Correct article usage
the prospects
show examples
and drawbacks of social
network
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networks
show examples
in general.
However
, after
Correct article usage
a thoroughly
show examples
thoroughly
Change the word
thorough
show examples
analysis of both sides,
it is clear that
the negative
effects
these
sites
brought to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society are far more
that
Correct your spelling
than
show examples
their positives. It is
therefore
suggested that these companies should be limited by the government and people should carefully consider these
effects
before using those networks.
Submitted by xbinh91 on

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General
Try to proofread your essay to correct spelling and grammatical mistakes. This will help in making your ideas clearer and your argument more persuasive.
General
Provide more relevant and specific examples to illustrate your points, as this will make your argument stronger and more convincing.
General
Ensure to maintain a consistent and clear logical structure throughout the essay. This will help in enhancing the flow and readability.
Introduction
The introduction gives a clear overview of the topic and presents the main argument effectively.
Conclusion
The essay includes a conclusion that summarizes the main points and provides a clear stance on the issue.
Content
The essay covers both the advantages and disadvantages of social networking sites, showing a balanced view before reaching a conclusion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • mental health
  • anxiety
  • depression
  • loneliness
  • face-to-face interaction
  • interpersonal skills
  • misinformation
  • public opinion
  • addiction
  • productivity
  • cyberbullying
  • emotional distress
  • privacy concerns
  • identity theft
  • data mining
  • networking opportunities
  • raising awareness
  • social issues
  • curated images
  • real-life social interaction
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