IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people say it is important to keep your home and work tidy with everything organized and in the correct places, what is your opinion about it?

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In
this
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 contemporary epoch, keeping the
home
Use synonyms
 and
work
Use synonyms
 tidy and organized is an essential topic to discuss and analyze at the same time that most
people
Use synonyms
 are interested in daily. In the recent time,
this
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 point is important.
Otherwise
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, it is controversial. It is important to speak about the pros and cons of keeping the
home
Use synonyms
 and
work
Use synonyms
 tidy and organized. There are some distinctive benefits of keeping
home
Use synonyms
 and
work
Use synonyms
 tidy and organized.
First,
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makes
people
Use synonyms
 feel more rejuvenated when
people
Use synonyms
 keep everything tidy and organized. There have been immense advances in tidy and organized
home
Use synonyms
 and
work
Use synonyms
. in most aspects of the lives of
people
Use synonyms
.
In other words
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, it is active in every realm of
society
Use synonyms
. Individuals believe in the role of keeping everything in the right place in
society
Use synonyms
. It will impact in a positive way on
people
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.
Second,
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if the
home
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 or
work
Use synonyms
 is dirty and everything is randomly it may impact the production in the
home
Use synonyms
 or
work
Use synonyms
. I
work
Use synonyms
 as a legal researcher in the legal department, and I understand that using keeping everything tidy and organized is very necessary for
people
Use synonyms
 especially those who use a lot of paper and open a lot of files and documents.
Moreover
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, tidy and
Use synonyms
work
Wrong verb form
working
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tidy and organized can have a positive effect on the environment. A new study from Chicago University shows that the individuals around the world who keep everything organized in their
work
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,
their
Add a missing verb
have their
show examples
 productivity to reach 80%. On the other side, there are many negatives. One of them is that
people
Use synonyms
 may spend lots of time tidying and organizing everything. Facts in
this
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 field have proved that it has an impact on
society
Use synonyms
.
Also
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, some
people
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 who have other mentality prefer to keep everything random because
that is
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 the way that they can think and produce. These are the major reasons why a large number of
people
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 go to other options.
To sum up
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, keeping
work
Use synonyms
 and
home
Use synonyms
 tidy and organized has brought many benefits to
society
Use synonyms
.
However
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, it is likely to produce many negative effects soon, but
people
Use synonyms
 cannot stop depending on it.

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coherence
Try to reduce redundancy in your introduction. Phrases like 'discuss and analyze' can be streamlined for clarity.
cohesion
Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next. Consider using transitional phrases to aid coherence.
coherence
Avoid repetition of ideas and words. For example, 'tidy and organized' is repeated several times. Synonyms could be used to maintain reader engagement.
task response
Provide more relevant examples to support your ideas. For instance, citing specific scenarios or studies in more detail could enhance your argument.
task response
Your introduction clearly outlines the aim of the essay and addresses the topic in a comprehensive manner.
cohesion
You have included a conclusion that summarizes the main points discussed, which is very effective.
coherence
The essay is structured in paragraphs, each dealing with a different aspect of the topic, which is good for readability.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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