In some country, more and more adults are continuing to live with their parents even after they have completed education and found jobs. Do the advantages outweight the disadvantages.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
People across the world are starting to live with their
parents
even after completing their educations and having jobs.
This
essay will acknowledge both
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
and disadvantages of the given topic. On
one
Correct article usage
the one
show examples
hand, staying with your
parents
means that you can rely on each other whenever needed
while
also
strengthening your bond over time.
Moreover
, staying with your
parents
can
also
be a more lively experience, leaving behind the idea of loneliness caused by living alone. I think that being able to take care of your
parents
when they are old is the least you can do for them
afterall
Correct your spelling
after all
they went through.
Furthermore
,
parents
can provide emotional and financial support, creating a stable environment for young adults starting their careers. Staying in the same home means saving costs on things like electricity and the mortgage for the home.
On the other hand
, Staying with your
parents
means reducing your privacy
while
also
reducing your independence, which could affect personal growth.
Furthermore
, staying with your
parents
could cause conflicts in things like responsibilities and personal habits which could
also
have an effect on your relationship.
To conclude
, I believe that the advantages of staying with your
parents
outweigh the disadvantages.
Submitted by satyarthverma88 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Make sure to clearly state your position in the introduction to give the reader a clear perspective of your argument throughout the essay.
task response
Work on providing more specific examples to support your points. This will make your arguments stronger and more convincing.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the logical structure by ensuring each paragraph transitions smoothly and clearly connects to the main argument.
coherence and cohesion
Provide a more detailed conclusion that summarizes the main points and reiterates why the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
task response
The essay addresses both advantages and disadvantages, making it a balanced discussion.
coherence and cohesion
There is a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
overall writing quality
The writer demonstrates a good command of English, with appropriate vocabulary and sentence structure.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • emotional support
  • financial support
  • cost savings
  • housing costs
  • living expenses
  • closer family bonds
  • delayed independence
  • self-sufficiency
  • privacy issues
  • personal growth
  • household responsibilities
  • lifestyle choices
  • potential conflict
What to do next:
Look at other essays: