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Band 7

Being only child is better than having siblings. Do you agree or disagree?

#child #siblings
nowadays, the controversy surrounding the advantages and disadvantages of being an only
child
 has been a prominent topic. From my perspective,
while
 I accept that an only
child
 may suffer from loneliness and sole responsibility for ageing
parents
, I believe that it is more likely to have positive influences, including better access to financial and emotional support and less sibling rivalry. On the one hand, it is undeniable that there are some problems associated with being an only
child
.
Firstly
, an only
child
 may suffer from loneliness
due to
 the lack of other
children
 in the house to play and communicate with.
This
 could negatively affect their communication skills,
such
 as resilience and problem-solving skills, as they are not taught to interact with peers.
In addition
, when they become adults, they should have all the responsibility to take care of their ageing
parents
.
Therefore
,
this
 burden may influence their mental well-being in the long run.
On the other hand
, I believe that the aforementioned negative influences could be outweighed by the following merits. One primary advantage of being an only
child
 is that sibling rivalry and competition among
children
 are not problems anymore. In fact, the lack of conflicts may contribute to some
overall
 mental health, by decreasing the instances of stress, anxiety and depression.
Moreover
, being an only
child
 means that emotional support from their
parents
 is not divided among
children
. With no siblings to compete,
children
 receive undivided love, support, and attention from their
parents
, which may lead to more self-confidence and stronger
child
-parent bonds.
Besides
, by focusing on a single
child
,
parents
 can provide them with better financial resources, potentially leading to access to high-quality education, extracurricular activities, and healthcare. In conclusion, even though it is beneficial to live in a big immediate family to some extent, I believe that the advantages of being an only
child
 surpass the disadvantages.
Submitted by Nastaran_zandy on

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task achievement
To score higher in Task Achievement, consider providing more relevant specific examples to back up your points. Concrete examples can greatly enhance the persuasiveness of your argument.
coherence cohesion
To further improve Coherence and Cohesion, ensure that all main points are consistently well-supported with evidence. While the logical structure is strong, deeper elaboration on each point can solidify the argument.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and logical structure, making it easy for the reader to follow your arguments.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-presented, framing your essay effectively.
task achievement
You have successfully covered both sides of the argument, which demonstrates a balanced and comprehensive approach to the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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