IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

You have been introduced to a compelling theatre show by a friend. Send an e-mail to another friend who you think is interested in the show and invite them to go with you.

#theatre #show #friend #e-mail
Dear Roj, How is it going with you ? Are you used to your new accommodation in London? There is nothing special about me; I'm writing
this
 email in order to recommend you to come with me to an outstanding play which has been
gone
Verb problem
apply
show examples
on the scene since
last
 month. Indeed,
this
 piece of art
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 introduced to me by one of my artistic friends-he is called Ali- I think you know him; he is a theatre director. I met him out of the blue in the cafe yesterday and he discussed
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
this
 controversial play; he encouraged me to go and watch it.
Furthermore
, its genre is
historical
Add an article
a historical
show examples
 drama which contains many live visual effects and all of the actors and actresses have virtuoso performances, the artists who have
practiced
Change the spelling
practised
show examples
 for many months. He didn't explain a story to me as he invited me to watch it.
Due to
 the fact that
this
 performance has become a blockbuster and box-office hit, all seats have been booked and there is no available ticket to purchase. Surprisingly, He has two free invitation cards for guests; he kindly gave them to me and now I have two tickets for the 19th of October.
Therefore
, as I know you are interested in
such
 plays I will be grateful
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 if you join me
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 watching
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
. I'm keenly looking forward to your answer; please, inform me about it. Best wishes, Shaghayegh
Submitted by shaghayegh95shadman on

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coherence cohesion
Your email is very well-structured and effectively communicates your message. To enhance it further, consider varying your sentence structures and using more transitional phrases to improve flow.
task achievement
While your email covers all necessary information, introducing a brief hook or interesting fact about the play at the beginning might capture your friend's interest even more.
task achievement
You have provided clear and comprehensive details about the play, including its genre and the background of the recommendation.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your email is strong, with a clear introduction, main body, and conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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