Everyone should become vegetarian because they do not need to eat meat to have a healthy diet, To what extent do you aree or disagree?

#meat #diet #aree

Some experts believe that everybody should eat

vegetables

and completely cut down on

meat

products.

In other words

,some

people

feel that not only do they not have to eat just

meat

or fish in order to be healthy,but

also

they can be

vegeterian

Correct your spelling

vegetarian

and consume

vegetables

and

fruits

.I strongly disagree with

this

opinion and

also

I will propose some significant reasons for my disagreement. First of all,it is argued by some

people

that if

people

tended to follow a healthy

diet

,it would be better to avoid eating

meat

This

is because it is recommended by some nutrition doctors that

people

should eat plenty of

fruits

and

vegetables

so as to stay healthy.

Moreover

,some

people

think if they give up eating

meat

,they will

less

Add a missing verb

be less

show examples

likely to gain weight.

That is

to say,as there is not any fatness in

vegetables

,the majority of

people

may prefer to use

vegetabels

Correct your spelling

vegetables

vegetable

and

fruits

However

,I personally think one of

most

Add an article

the most

show examples

momentous

criterias

Correct your spelling

criteria

for having a healthy

diet

is eating

meat

,fish and

vegetables

together in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

suitable portion sizes.Clearly,if

people

try to cut down on eating

meat

,they will lose more protein and energy which is in fleshy products.

although

Capitalize word

Although

show examples

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

there are various proteins in beans,

lentil

Fix the agreement mistake

lentils

show examples

and some

fruits

,the amount of healthy nutrients in

meat

is substantially more than

Change preposition

in vegetabels

show examples

vegetabels

Correct your spelling

vegetables

Additionally

people

can be in

shaped

Replace the word

shape

show examples

and have a healthy

diet

providing that they work out regularly and give up eating junk food.

To conclude

,there is no doubt that some

people

hold the view that avoiding

meat

can lead to

Wrong verb form

following

show examples

a healthy

diet

.I tend to be against

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

this

idea because

people

can stay healthy

with

Change preposition

show examples

cutting down on fast food and

also

consume

Wrong verb form

consuming

show examples

some

meat

moderately.

Submitted by TUTOO on Tue Aug 27 2024

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coherence cohesion

The essay would benefit from a clearer structure and improved transitions between ideas. Try to use more cohesive devices to link your ideas together and ensure a smooth flow from one point to the next.

task achievement

Work on developing your ideas more thoroughly. Provide specific examples or evidence to support your points. This will make your argument more convincing and your essay more engaging.

task achievement

The introduction clearly states the writer's position, and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points.

coherence cohesion

The essay addresses the topic and task adequately, providing a clear response and covering all necessary aspects.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

272 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Everyone should become vegetarian because they do not need to eat meat to have a healthy diet, To what extent do you aree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free time. Discuss both views and state your opinion.

Some people tend to take temporary jobs (they only work for few months of years )for they have time to do other things. Do you the advantage outweigh disadvantages?

Solving environmental problems should be the responsibility of an international organization rather than each national government. Do you agree or disagree?

Do the benefits of genetic engineering outweigh the dangers? ? (Genetically Modified Organisms – GMOs)

Some people say that now we can see films on our phones or tablets there is no need to go to the cinemas. Others, say that to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in cinema. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.