“some parents think that childcare centres provide the best services for children of preschool age. Other working parents think that family members such as grandparents will be better carers for their kids”. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Some would argue that working
parents
Use synonyms
should depend on family members to take care of their children,
instead
Linking Words
of
childcare
Use synonyms
services.
While
Linking Words
many people would prefer kids' official
centres
Use synonyms
, I agree that relative support is the best option.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
childcare
Use synonyms
places are very common
solution
Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
show examples
for
parents
Use synonyms
to rely on
while
Linking Words
they are at work. It provides trained teachers with a degree in the development of early childhood. The main reason why
parents
Use synonyms
prefer the official
centres
Use synonyms
is that most of them offer teaching classes
such
Linking Words
as reading, writing, and music.
For example
Linking Words
, in KSA, governments spend around 1M to enhance the services that are provided by
childcare
Use synonyms
centres
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, I believe that kids
centres
Use synonyms
is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
an insecure
Use synonyms
place
Fix the agreement mistake
places
show examples
to leave young children and a relative house is better because it provides more safety for a
child
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, close relatives
such
Linking Words
as grandparents, siblings and uncles, are the best caregivers for a
child
Use synonyms
. They are aware of the
child
Use synonyms
's personality better, which leads them to deal with the
child
Use synonyms
's needs in a less strict way.
In addition
Linking Words
to that, a
child
Use synonyms
is familiar with a relative house which will result in having no difficulties adapting
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
a new
place
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the
child
Use synonyms
will feel very comfortable and safe.
For example
Linking Words
, a study shows that a
Use synonyms
child's
Change the noun form
children
child
show examples
needs a lot of time to adapt
a
Change preposition
to a
show examples
new
place
Use synonyms
,
therefore
Linking Words
, I believe a house of a trusted family member is the best option.
To conclude
Linking Words
, most
parents
Use synonyms
believe that
childcare
Use synonyms
centres
Use synonyms
are the best
place
Use synonyms
for children,
however
Linking Words
, I agree that a relative member is better because of the positive impact on the kid.
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task achievement
Strengthen the introduction by clearly stating the thesis statement. Make sure the main idea of each paragraph is apparent right from the beginning.
coherence cohesion
Make sure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea and that the transition between paragraphs is smooth. This will help in maintaining a logical structure throughout the essay.
task achievement
Use a wider range of vocabulary and more complex sentence structures. This will enhance the clarity and depth of your essay.
task achievement
The essay addresses both views well and provides a balanced discussion around the topic.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively restates your opinion and summarizes the main points discussed in the essay.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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