The most important role of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extend do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples form your own knowledge or experience.
It is often believed that the primary role of
science
is to develop the way people
live. I partially agree with this
, for medical products lead to the improvement of public health regardless of other significant roles of science
to preserve the environment.
On the one hand, science
should play a critical role in saving people
's lives in the emergence of new diseases, making people
more vulnerable to them. In other words
, they are threatening the lives of millions of people
, especially children and seniors, whose immune system is generally weaker than that of young adults. For instance
,the pandemic of coronavirus in 2019 led to approximately 506000 deaths in Japan as there was no effective medical treatment at that time. Thus
, science
should be developed to produce medicines and vaccines to mitigate the severe symptoms of infected patients as well as
prevent their deaths, which will make a significant contribution to increasing their sense of happiness and safety.
On the other hand
, progress in science
should also
be made in solving environmental problems, which it makes difficult for wild animals to adapt to. Indeed, the growing contamination of water should be immediately tackled by the increasing understanding of science
, which allows scientists to detect and remove harmful chemicals in the ocean. Furthermore
, the development of science
will lead to various theories and hypotheses, making it possible for people
to react instantly before some dangers arise. This
is significant as several marine creatures are already dead such
as tuna and squids due to
exposure to highly toxic materials, which leads to declining biodiversity.
In conclusion, I somewhat agree that science
should be enhanced to promote the lives of people
with a growing demand for medical products to cure unknown diseases. However
, the escalating damage to the environment requires a more scientific understanding to prevent the contamination and deaths of innocent wild creatures.Submitted by mizuho on
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task achievement
Your essay presents a balanced view on the topic and addresses both sides of the argument, which is commendable. However, there are areas where clarity can be improved. Aim to make your ideas more comprehensive by elaborating on certain points. For instance, the statement about wild animals and their inability to adapt can be further explained.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical flow between your main points. While your essay is well-structured, sometimes the transition from one idea to another can be jarring. Using more cohesive devices can help to create smoother transitions.
task achievement
The introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively frame the essay. You successfully introduce the topic and also summarize your points effectively, providing a well-rounded essay.
task achievement
The main points in your essay are generally well-supported with examples, particularly the reference to the COVID-19 pandemic, which adds relevance and timeliness to your argument.