Some people believe that individuals cannot improve the environment, but only governments and big companies can make a difference. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people feel that only the governments and multinational companies could make the development of the
environment
.
However
,
individuals
could not give the difference about that. I personally do not entirely accept
this
and will explain why in
this
essay. On the one hand, I believe that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
governments and multinational companies can be
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
decision
maker
Fix the agreement mistake
makers
show examples
for making
Correct article usage
the evironmeny
show examples
evironmeny
Correct your spelling
environment
better.
Besides
, they have networking to make some projects about improving the
environment
.
For instance
, they can build the building with eco-friendly
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
investor
Fix the agreement mistake
investors
show examples
from other countries.
Furthermore
, they have sophisticated
machine
Fix the agreement mistake
machines
show examples
for cleaning the river.
Hence
, they have some projects that can be beneficial for the
environment
.
On the other hand
, I believe
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individuals
have to make
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
moving
Wrong verb form
move
show examples
to make a difference.
For example
,
Correct article usage
the Pandawara
show examples
Pandawara
Correct your spelling
Pandora
group begins
from
Change preposition
with
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
one person
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
clean
Change the verb form
cleans
show examples
the river using
simple
Add an article
a simple
show examples
tool
Fix the agreement mistake
tools
show examples
and
traditional
Replace the word
traditions
show examples
.
However
,
this
movement
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
other people join
this
trend by cleaning
river
Fix the agreement mistake
rivers
show examples
near their
house
Fix the agreement mistake
houses
show examples
. It can be seen that the influence
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
social media is highly recommended.
Moreover
,
this
trend become gathering activist to improve their
environment
.
Therefore
, the
individuals
can be a solid group that can create
tha
Correct your spelling
the
transformation for
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
.
To sum up
, I feel that
individuals
can be a community that
Add a missing verb
is concern
show examples
concern
Replace the word
concerned
show examples
about the
environment
and create some
activity
Fix the agreement mistake
activities
show examples
for enhancing
Change preposition
to enhance
show examples
the
environment
.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

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task achievement
Work on developing clear and comprehensive ideas for each paragraph. The points made are valid but need to be elaborated with more detail.
coherence cohesion
Focus on improving the logical structure of your essay. Ensure that ideas flow smoothly from one to the next and that paragraphs are effectively linked.
coherence cohesion
The essay clearly presents an introduction and conclusion, fulfilling structural requirements.
task achievement
There are relevant and specific examples provided, such as the Pandawara group, which support the main points.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • sustainability
  • carbon footprint
  • renewable energy
  • conservation
  • corporate social responsibility
  • policy implementation
  • grassroots movement
  • environmental advocacy
  • legislation
  • systemic change
  • collective impact
  • green initiatives
  • pollution control
  • biodiversity
  • global warming
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