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Writing Samples
Band 7

The graph below shows US consumers' average annual expenditures on cell phone and residential phone services between 2001 and 2010.

The graph below shows US consumers' average annual expenditures on cell phone and residential phone services between 2001 and 2010.
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The line graph depicts moderate US clients' spending on mobile
phone
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 and residential
phone
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services
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 over a period of 9 years, from 2001 to 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
 the
number
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 of cell
phone
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services
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 was gradually rising
year
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 by
year
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, there was a downward trend for the level of house
phone
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 servicing. In 2001, the average amount of expenditure on mobile
phone
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services
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 was a little more than $200 in a
year
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.
Then
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, its
number
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 slightly increased, having reached $300 in 2002, after which there was a constant rise during the next 5 years. Equaling nearly $600 in 2007, the
number
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 continued growing until it almost doubled by the end of the period. Starting at its peak of approximately $700, the annual
number
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 of
services
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 for residential phones began to decline slowly, reaching about $500 in a
year
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 in 2007.
Finally
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, keeping decreasing
further
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, it got less than $400 in 2010, having dropped by almost $300 over 9 years.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in 2006, numbers for both
phone
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services
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 showed the same result of nearly $550 in the middle of the decade.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words phone, services, number, year with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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