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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people think that robots are important for humanʼs future development. Others think that robots have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #robots #humanʼs #future #development #effects #society
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Artificial intelligence has been a hot topic for discussion in recent times, especially
due to
 how rapidly new developments in the field are being made. More advancements in the field
has
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have
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 been made in just the
last
 5 years alone than
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 entire time AI has been a thing. With innovations
such
 as generative art, chatbots, and voice models it should be no surprise that there will be a lot of divide surrounding the topic.
This
 essay aims to explore the ideas behind both sides; for and against AI, and give my own thoughts on the discourse. When generative AI first became popular with the creation of tools
such
 as DALL-E, concerns immediately arose regarding the moral implications of using
such
 tools. It didn't take long for people to discover that AI models scour the internet for pre-existing artworks as a basis for their generations, and
this
 garnered a lot of controversy. Robots were essentially stealing elements from works that real artists put time and effort into making. To me,
this
 was the main catalyst behind the movement against AI, and I think
this
 point
in particular
 is understandable and I agree with it to an extent.
However
, there are clear benefits of it as well. The most obvious and foremost benefit is that proper usage of AI accelerates mundane tasks for humans, and in some cases completely automates them. When you think about it, machines were invented in the first place to make doing things easier for humans. AI is the same in that sense. Thanks to
this
, we are able to speed up processes and make time for
further
 developments.
Finally
, to wrap things up I want to say that I do believe that AI is more beneficial to the development of society
overall
 than it is a detriment.
However
,
such
 powerful tools must be used correctly, and I do think that generative art does not fall under the 'proper use'.
Submitted by nbogey777 on

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task achievement
Ensure that all arguments are evenly developed and supported with specific examples.
coherence cohesion
Work on a more logical progression of ideas for improved coherence and cohesion.
coherence cohesion
Integrate smoother transitions between paragraphs.
task achievement
The essay clearly presents both sides of the debate, fulfilling the task requirement.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are clearly present and effectively frame the essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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