some cultures, childrens are often told they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Working is an It is certainly
essential
Correct article usage
an essential
things
in our lives. true that Fix the agreement mistake
thing
kids
can achleve
the best if they Correct your spelling
achieve
work
hard. However
, not all the effects of this
innovation have been positive, although
there are surely some advantages.
There are several drawbacks to tell
Wrong verb form
telling
kids
to Work
hard. Exposing children in
difficult Change preposition
to
Work
Can lead them to the potential of disappointment, thereby, kids
can't be empowered to work
hard again. For example
, the result of conducted research illustrates that the race of kids
who do their best, then
face unrealistic expectations are suffered from anxiety and pressure. As a result
, this
could affect the belief that they on their health. Moreover
, can achieve anything while
Working hard which will make them believe only Working
hard, and ignoring other factors that help them to arrive at the Change preposition
in Working
sucseed
Correct your spelling
succeed
such
as luck, talent and opportunity.
In spite of these negative aspects, however
, believing in the power of hard work
boosts the
Correct article usage
apply
self confidence
.Add a hyphen
self-confidence
Kids
encourage
to develop and improve themself. Wrong verb form
are encouraged
for instance
, in some private school
, students who are required to Fix the agreement mistake
schools
work
hard more
than others, students perform better than their classmates. Replace the word
harder
Thus
, they can innovate and create wisely. Furthermore
, if children used to work
hard, they will probably be an
independent people. They may face any issue and solve it by themself like Correct article usage
apply
while
travelling, cleaning •So, they Cooking. their problems. have the responsibility to carry or
In conclusion, working hard for children might have both advantages and disadvantages. parents have a vital role in supporting their kids
to be able to face any issue.Submitted by 13570581 on
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task achievement
Improve clarity in your ideas by ensuring proper sentence structure. Avoid fragmented and run-on sentences.
task achievement
Provide more relevant and specific examples to construct and substantiate your points effectively.
coherence cohesion
Focus on a logical flow of information. Connect your sentences and paragraphs using appropriate linking words and phrases.
coherence cohesion
Refine your introduction to make it clear and engaging. Try to summarize the essay's main points in the conclusion effectively.
task achievement
The essay addresses both the advantages and disadvantages, fulfilling the task requirements.
task achievement
Attempts to provide specific examples to support points made, which can be developed further.
coherence cohesion
Includes an introduction and conclusion, giving the essay a beginning and an end.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...
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