Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
group of people believe that
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
pupils have to study
all days
Fix the agreement mistake
every day

It seems that all days may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
when they finish high school.
i
Change the capitalization
I

The pronoun I should always be capitalized.

show examples
harshly disagree because
i
Change the capitalization
I

The pronoun I should always be capitalized.

show examples
subscribe to the notion that
a
Remove the article
apply

The indefinite article, a, may be redundant when used with the uncountable noun life in your sentence. Consider removing it.

show examples
life
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

has quite of different aspects
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

show examples
all of
them
Correct pronoun usage
which

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

show examples
are significant in order to make
effective
Correct article usage
an effective

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
life
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in future, some aspects
likes
Change the verb form
like

The singular verb likes does not appear to agree with the plural subject aspects. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

show examples
political, economic, religious, sentimental plus educational which youngsters have to thrive in all section simultaneously and spontaneously.
firstly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
life
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is not studying all the time
beside
Correct your spelling
besides

The word beside doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
students bear distinct talents in various majors
for instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

some students are good at academic
kwnoledges
Correct your spelling
skills

If you don’t want kwnoledges to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

and some of them are influential in occupational
work
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

like mechanic
or
Correct word choice
apply

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

show examples
civil servant
or
Correct word choice
apply

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

show examples
truck
drivers
Fix the agreement mistake
driver

It seems that drivers may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
or blue-collar
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs

It seems that job may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
which these occupations do not require high-level of education,
although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

these jobs play sophisticated role in daily
life
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, if there were not any
work
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

forces, how an engineer might construct a building.
additionaly
Correct your spelling
Additionally

If you don’t want additionaly to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

,
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students

It seems that student may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
have to
develope them-selvs
Correct your spelling
develop themselves

The words develope them-selvs seem to be misspelled. Consider replacing them.

in all walks of
life
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

rationally and equally
besides
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, they should try to strike
balance
Correct article usage
a balance

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
between educational level and social class since
bearing
Verb problem
having

There may be a verb use issue here.

show examples
high
Correct article usage
a high

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
level of education and not having moral values
creat
Correct your spelling
creates

The word creat doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
some severe issues for teenagers.
on the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
for
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
many people
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

show examples
belive
Correct your spelling
believe

The word belive doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students

It seems that student may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
should study
full- time
Correct your spelling
full-time

The word full- time seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

show examples
. they are not able to think
the
Change preposition
about the

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
subjects out of the box because they think if people study more and acquire academic
khnoledge
Correct your spelling
knowledge

If you don’t want khnoledge to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

, their future
would
Wrong verb form
will

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb would. Consider changing it.

show examples
be provide
Change the verb form
be provided

It appears that the form of the verb provide does not work with be in this sentence.

show examples
and
guarantee
Wrong verb form
guaranteed

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb guarantee. Consider changing it.

show examples
besides
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, they
belive
Correct your spelling
believe

The word belive doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
that way of developing country pass from university , they do not consider other development elements like adept
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

work force
Correct your spelling
workforce

The word work force seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

show examples
which they are not nurtured at University and college. as outlined above,
i
Change the capitalization
I

The pronoun I should always be capitalized.

show examples
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
belive
Correct your spelling
believe

The word belive doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
that pupils should
work
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

on all
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts

It seems that part may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
of
Correct your spelling
their
thier
Correct your spelling
their

If you don’t want thier to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

life
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

not only education, and find
their
Change the word
the

The word their may be incorrect in this context. Consider changing it.

show examples
appropriate way in order to become
Correct your spelling
successful
successfull
Correct your spelling
successful

If you don’t want successfull to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
To improve task achievement, ensure your response directly addresses all parts of the question. Make sure your ideas are fully developed and supported with relevant examples.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, focus on structuring your essay with clear paragraphs, including a strong introduction and conclusion. Make use of appropriate linking words and phrases to guide the reader through your argument more smoothly.
grammar vocabulary
Pay attention to grammar, spelling, and punctuation. Improving these aspects will enhance readability and make your arguments more compelling.
task achievement
Developing your points with more precision and clarity can help in expressing comprehensive ideas effectively.
task achievement
You have a good understanding of the topic and your perspective is clear and distinct.
task achievement
Many of your arguments are thoughtful and showcase an understanding that life requires a balance of various aspects beyond education.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: