IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The widespread of the Internet gives people more freedom to work and study at home instead of traveling to office and school. Do the advantages outweigh disadvantages?

Nowadays
due to
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 advancements in
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 individuals can perform their office and school
duties
Use synonyms
 more feasibly
while
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 being at
home
Use synonyms
 rather than commuting to the workplace and educational institutions.I believe it has more benefits
such
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 as it saves
time
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of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
travelling
as well as
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 it gives more opportunity to perform
duties
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 in a more comfortable
environment
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surronded
Correct your spelling
surrounded
 by family members, but
this
Linking Words
 situation
also
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 poses some issues, as it leads to
Use synonyms
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of professional growth and
also
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 working and studying from
home
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 can
also
Linking Words
 distract
people
Use synonyms
 from their goals.
To begin
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 with, remote
work
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 or
study
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 clearly cuts a great amount of
time
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 that it takes workers or students to go to their specific
office
Fix the agreement mistake
offices
show examples
 and institutions. They can utilize that
time
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 in more effective ways by brainstorming more ideas.
Additionally
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,
people
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 tend to
work
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 and
study
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 more comfortably in their own personal space as they are used to
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
it and it
also
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 gives them the opportunity to take
resting
Change the form of the verb
rest
show examples
 breaks in between.
Finally
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, as individuals are at their own
Use synonyms
home
Fix the agreement mistake
homes
show examples
 surrounded by the
people
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 they love, it
also
Linking Words
 gives them mental peace and by
that
Add a comma
that,
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 they often outperform their
duties
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 and it
also
Linking Words
 creates stronger
bond
Fix the agreement mistake
bonds
show examples
 between family members.
For instance
Linking Words
, during
covid-19
Correct your spelling
COVID-19
show examples
, as everyone was facing lockdown
so
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
people
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 doing remote
work
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 found it better to
work
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 from their own
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home
Fix the agreement mistake
homes
show examples
 as it led to more creative ideas
as well as
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 it made them able to bond with their families in a more productive way resulting in
peaceful
Add an article
a peaceful
show examples
environment
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 at
home
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.
On the other hand
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, performing official and educational
duties
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 from
home
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 can
also
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 have cons
such
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 as
it leads
Wrong verb form
leading
show examples
 to
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lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of personal and professional growth.
This
Linking Words
 is because
people
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 are doing remote
work
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 and
study
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 and they are not interacting with
people
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 outside their homes,
as a result
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, workers and students often feel
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lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of motivation and confidence in them. It
also
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 impedes the way by which
people
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 often make new friends.
Also
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, working from
home
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 can have some distractions as sometimes you might have visitors at
home
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 or there might be some other engagements leading to
loosing
Replace the word
losing
show examples
 interest in
studies
Correct pronoun usage
your studies
show examples
.
For example
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, most men prefer to
work
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 in
quiet
Add an article
a quiet
show examples
environment
Use synonyms
 as it improves their
work
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 efficacy and that's sometimes not possible in homes having kids around. In conclusion, it is evident that remote
work
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 and
study
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has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 some of
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 demerits in the form of distractions and
lack
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 of professional and personal growth but the potential merits
such
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 as
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time saving
Add a hyphen
time-saving
show examples
,
comfortability
Replace the word
comfort
show examples
 and
peaceful
Correct article usage
a peaceful
show examples
environment
Use synonyms
 clearly outweigh these issues.

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coherence cohesion
The essay could benefit from clearer topic sentences in body paragraphs to guide the reader better about the main idea of each paragraph.
task achievement
Try to reduce minor grammatical errors to make the essay more polished and easier to read.
coherence cohesion
Add more varied sentence structures and transitional phrases to improve the overall flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-formulated, giving a clear understanding of your stance on the topic.
task achievement
The essay effectively discusses both advantages and disadvantages, providing a balanced view with specific examples.
task achievement
Your main points are well-supported and relevant to the topic, making your argument strong.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • flexibility
  • work-life balance
  • commuting costs
  • professional attire
  • accessibility
  • educational resources
  • remote areas
  • underserved areas
  • traffic congestion
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • environmental conservation
  • loneliness
  • isolation
  • mental health
  • social interaction
  • networking
  • distractions
  • productivity
  • academic performance
  • structured environment
  • technological devices
  • reliable internet access
  • work-life boundary
  • disengage
  • burnout
What to do next:
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