In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.
Education helps to develop the nation's economy and
also
the literacy rate of the country. In some countries, university Linking Words
students
live at home with their families Use synonyms
while
they study, but in other countries, Linking Words
students
move to attend university in another city. In Use synonyms
this
essay, we are going to see how studying away from their hometown gives benefits for the Linking Words
students
and how it outweighs the disadvantages.
Many Use synonyms
students
like to study in their nearby universities because they like to survive in a comfort zone which gives them more advantages like Use synonyms
friends
, family, relatives etc. But Use synonyms
students
studying away from their born place makes them feel lonely for somedays after that they have a chance to evaluate their skills. Use synonyms
This
helps the Linking Words
students
to create a new community of Use synonyms
friends
and they learn some new skills to survive in the future with or without their Use synonyms
friends
and family. Use synonyms
For example
, a student was living in a comfort zone with everyone he knew suddenly he went out to a new place means he did not know how to survive there but after understanding the area he could survive on his own.
Linking Words
Students
studying away from their hometowns face many problems language barriers, communication, culture and some other problems may occur for them but these problems are just like small pieces of stone for them after connecting with everyone in the new place. The major problem they face is homesickness and feeling lonely will affect their mental health but it was based on the person's mental strength. Use synonyms
For example
, a lion cub was alone in the forest without their Linking Words
friends
and family in the beginning it was difficult to adapt to the situation after growing on the lion cub started to create a new community on its own Use synonyms
this
is how the Linking Words
students
feel in the beginning but Use synonyms
this
will change them to different person.
In conclusion, Linking Words
students
studying in another city are just like lion cubs it will be difficult for them to adapt to the new conditions after adopting to those conditions the Use synonyms
students
can survive anywhere on their own without anyone's help in their life and their skill development help them create a new world for them.Use synonyms
Submitted by insighttribez on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task response
Ensure you address all parts of the task more thoroughly. While you discussed both benefits and disadvantages, some points lacked depth, particularly in examples.
coherence and cohesion
Improve your use of transitional phrases and linking words to make your essay flow better. This will help in guiding your reader through your arguments more clearly.
supporting ideas
Provide more specific and concrete examples to support your arguments. This makes your points more compelling and the essay more interesting to read.
language accuracy
Watch out for minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Polishing these will help in conveying your ideas more clearly and effectively.
structure
Good job on having a clear introduction and conclusion. You also made an effort to present both sides of the argument, which adds balance to your essay.
task response
The essay had some strong points about the benefits of moving to another city for university, which shows good insight.
illustration of ideas
You used appropriate examples like the lion cub analogy, which helped to illustrate your points in a creative way.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.