Some people say that museum should be free where as others opine that some entry fee should be there. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
In
this
contemporary world,it is argued that the public has to pay to view works of art
, while
others agree that admission to museums should be free. In this
essay, I will discuss both these views and try to draw some conclusions.
On the one hand, it is confirmed that entrance to the museum must be paid since the state spends a huge amount of cash on maintaining artworks. Specifically, technical equipment (CCTV cameras, impenetrable glass) and salaries for employees (guides, security guards). Also
, the public should invest money
in art
, as scientists need to organize excursions and expeditions, look for interesting artefacts and ancient jewellery and simply approve their theories with scientific facts. Moreover
, special conditions are needed to preserve exhibits, such
as humidity and lighting. And, of course, restoration work is very expensive. In other words
, contributing money
to museums helps support them.
On the other hand
, others believe that entrance to art
galleries
should be free, since not everyone has enough money
to afford to visit galleries
, even if it is a small amount of cash. States should create such
opportunities in order to
all people who want to visit them. Change preposition
for
Moreover
, free entrance to art
galleries
helps educate a huge audience, both adults and children.
In conclusion, while
some confirm that gallery admission should be without payment due to
the fact to educate as many people as possible, I would also
argue that museums must receive money
from the public,
because Remove the comma
apply
art
galleries
need cash to support themselves.Submitted by halilova039 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
The essay provides a clear response to the task, addressing both views and giving a personal opinion. However, consider including more specific examples to support your points and enhance the persuasiveness of the argument.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph is logically connected to the next. The transition between the paragraphs discussing the support for paid entry and free entry could be smoother. Using transitional phrases more effectively would improve coherence and cohesion.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction clearly states the topic and outlines what the essay will discuss, which provides a good framework for the reader.
logical structure
Each body paragraph is focused on a single main idea, making the essay easy to follow.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion successfully summarizes the main points discussed and clearly states your opinion, providing closure to the essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS
Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!