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Band 7.5

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #choices
Many
people
 claim that
people
 have abundant chances to opt in the modern era. I firmly agree with the idea that it is becoming more common that
people
 are able to choose from a vast range of options in diverse aspects. In the following essay, I am going to outline the reasons why I agree with
this
 thesis. First and foremost, one of the most significant factors that contribute to
this
 phenomenon is that the entire globe has been developing and the quality of living has been elevated
due to
 the rapid growth of technology and wider access to a range of resources.
For instance
, globalization has been a highly discussed topic in the previous decades, it has remarkably influenced the majority of countries in terms of their transformation in trade and education.
Therefore
, globalization tends to offer more opportunities for
people
 to choose between a variety of options in the fields of daily consumption, schooling, and employment to a great extent.
Nevertheless
, from an alternative perspective,
people
 could potentially be spoiled by possessing excess
choices
.
Furthermore
, malicious
choices
 might be selected
hence
 mislead individuals to an inappropriate pathway. Studies have shown that, when individuals encounter a vast spectrum of options, they would potentially pick the most negative ones.
Due to
this
 reason, it is evident that having too many
choices
 doesn’t always result in a positive consequence.
To conclude
, I personally agree with the argument that individuals have a lot more
choices
 than we should have nowadays
due to
 the rise of globalization and the more decent living style of communities nowadays.
Submitted by annaipsw13 on

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task response
While your essay effectively discusses the topic and provides a clear stance, it would be beneficial to add more specific examples to support your arguments further. This will enhance the depth and specificity of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph follows a logical structure with clear topic sentences and supporting details. Although your essay is generally well-organized, some ideas could be more elaborated for clarity.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-presented, clearly stating your position and summarizing your main points effectively.
task response
Your essay addresses the task comprehensively, providing a clear response to the prompt.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • overwhelmed
  • decision fatigue
  • paralysis by analysis
  • consumerism
  • globalization
  • personal autonomy
  • market saturation
  • option overload
  • decision-making process
  • psychological well-being
  • buyer's remorse
  • customization
  • trade-offs
  • minimalism
  • information superhighway
What to do next:
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