Some people say free time activities for children should be organised by parents. Others say that children should be free to choose what they do in their free time. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Although
some individuals believe that
children
should be free to choose the
way
to spend their leisure
time
because it is beneficial to their personality, I fully agree that parents should select the
activities
that their
children
do in their free
time
due to
their experiences and maturity. On the one hand, those who support the idea of
children
’s freedom believe that it is the best
way
to strengthen their personalities.
For instance
, when you give
children
the initiative to select what they prefer to consume as hobbies, their confidence and self-esteem will rise
as a consequence
as their brains receive those actions as a sign of maturity and
awarness
Correct your spelling
awareness
moreover
they will build responsible and strong personalities .I remark
this
type in my sister who usually makes every decision
bon
Correct your spelling
on
her own .
On the other hand
,
children
's free
time
activities
must be controlled by parents. Kids
due to
their lack of experience, they can get into harmful things.
Such
as drugs and alcohol, without realizing it's dangerous. So parents with their knowledge, can select convenient
activities
that combine with enjoyment and learning. Recent research conducted in London shows that about 90% of drug addicts have started their addictions at the age between 12 and 20. In conclusion,
while
various people think that giving the son or the daughter the responsibility to choose the
way
to spend their relaxing
time
is the best
way
to enhance their autonomy, I assume that mothers and fathers have to manage the
activities
that their
children
affect in their free
time
to ensure their safety and to protect them.
Submitted by habal.oumaima on

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task response
Try to provide more specific and varied examples to strengthen your arguments. Referencing just one personal anecdote might not be enough to convincingly support your points.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that there is a smooth and logical transition between sentences and paragraphs. This will help improve the overall readability and flow of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to proofread your essay to eliminate minor grammatical errors and improve sentence structure.
introduction
The introduction clearly presents both sides of the argument and states your opinion, providing a clear framework for the essay.
logical structure
The essay presents a balanced discussion of both viewpoints before arriving at the conclusion, which helps in creating a comprehensive argument.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • balanced development
  • expose children to
  • tailored activities
  • promote discipline
  • foster independence
  • genuine interests
  • free play
  • problem-solving skills
  • emotional well-being
  • unstructured time
  • personal exploration
  • structured activities
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