Many of the world’s cities are currently facing a serious housing shortage. What are some of the reasons for this shortage, and what solutions can you suggest? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Most cities worldwide are currently grappling with a pressing
issue-housing
overcrowding and shortage. Correct your spelling
issue of housing
This
urgent matter has captured public attention, and it's crucial to understand the causes behind it.
For instance
, Cairo is a relevant example of overcrowding, which could be due to
its enormous population, immigration from nearby countries because of the wars, and those who seek a better lifestyle. Moreover
, it prolongs age expectancy.
To emphasise detailedly, the solutions for this
significant problem are to build compartments with two or three levels, introduce birth control programmes and restrict the immigration process.
China has implemented the humankind limitation part.
To recapitulate the abovementioned conditions, the Government and society should conduct more research to find solutions for a better life and housing situation.Submitted by holamonem79 on
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task achievement
Your introduction captures the issue well, but it could be more explicit in outlining the essay's structure. Try to state briefly what you will discuss in terms of causes and solutions. This will make your essay easier to follow.
task achievement
Your points about Cairo are relevant, however, they need to be expanded and connected more clearly to the problem of housing shortage. As it stands, the examples are somewhat isolated. Try to weave them seamlessly into the discussion to enhance their impact.
task achievement
The solutions you provided are practical but could benefit from more development. For each solution, discuss how and why it might alleviate the housing shortage issue. This will add depth to your analysis and demonstrate comprehensive understanding.
coherence cohesion
Your essay’s structure can be improved. Each paragraph should ideally focus on a single main point. For instance, the reasons for the housing shortage should be clearly separated from the potential solutions.
coherence cohesion
In terms of cohesion, aim to use more linking words and phrases to guide the reader through your ideas. Phrases like 'Furthermore,' 'For example,' 'Consequently,' etc., can help make the transitions between your points smoother and more logical.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your conclusion not only summarizes the main points but also reflects on why the issue is significant and the potential impact of the suggested solutions. This will provide a stronger finish to your essay.
task achievement
Your essay prompts thoughtful consideration of a critical issue and presents relevant examples and potential solutions.
coherence cohesion
You have provided a conclusion that ties your essay together, reminding the reader of the importance of addressing housing shortages.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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