Many museums charge for admission while orthers are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

#museums #charge #admission #orthers #people

Some

museums

are free-entry, as opposed to those in which purchasing tickets is mandatory.

Although

by not paying

for

Change preposition

show examples

visit the

museums

more people would tend to visit,

however

, I believe that authorities could use the

museums

' income to take care of them, which is more beneficial. It is argued that free

museums

are more frequently visited and have

deeper

Add an article

a deeper

show examples

impact on general people. Because many people are not educated enough to appreciate history and culture.

As a result

, they do not have the tendency to spend money on these kinds of activities ,so by keeping cultural places free they would visit more often and the chance of them being educated raises.

For instance

, the Negarestan Museum is free once a year and on that day, it has the most visitors of all the year.

Consequently

, many youngsters get attracted to traditional paintings, which they have seen on that specific day.

However

, I believe that visiting cultural buildings

Correct subject-verb agreement

does

show examples

not have a knock-on impact on all the visitors and it is more beneficial to educate them in the school , not in

museums

On the other hand

museums

are mostly located in historical and old buildings and it is necessary to avoid destruction, which happens over the decades.

This

action ,

however

, is pricey and by selling tickets a major part of the cost would be covered. Not all cities and countries can be financially supportive of

this

pathway, so the

museums

' managers have to take action in their own hands.

For example

as a result

of the low budget, 'Chehel Sotun' of Isfahan was nearly ruined 10 years ago.

However

, the mayor ,by getting an

entering

Replace the word

entry

show examples

fee, managed to repair the precious building. I believe that getting a proper amount of

entry-fee

Correct your spelling

entry fee

show examples

would be useful for managing the

museums

in a more efficient way. In conclusion,

while

making

museums

free would lead to more visitors and growing awareness and knowledge, the ticket,s fee for maintaining the building is a necessity and without the money, many buildings would be ruined by now.

Submitted by golnaz.zv on Sun Sep 01 2024

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task achievement

Incorporate a more distinct introduction that clearly introduces your stance, making it easily understood from the beginning.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph clearly ties back to your main argument to maintain strong coherence.

task achievement

Minor grammatical errors should be revisited, particularly around article usage and singular/plural agreement.

task achievement

You provided relevant examples like the Negarestan Museum and 'Chehel Sotun' to support your points, which strengthens your argument.

coherence cohesion

You maintained a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which enhances readability.

coherence cohesion

Each paragraph focused on a single main idea, contributing to clear and organized communication.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

341 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Financial sustainability
Revenue stream
Maintenance
Exhibits
Educational programs
Facilities
Technology
Curatorial expertise
Visitor experience
Value perception
Accessibility barriers
Inclusiveness
Cultural resources
Alternative funding
Grants
Donations
Sponsorships

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Many museums charge for admission while orthers are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest time of most peoples live. Others think that adults life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsibilities. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

In recent years, “responsible tourists” have paid attention to preserving both culture and environment of the places they visit. However, some people say that it is impossible to be a “responsible tourist”. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many schools these days have problems with poor student behavior. Why do you think these problems occur? What could be done to tackle these problems.

You are not feeling well and you cannot continue your studies at school. Write a letter to your professor. - explain the situation; - ask permission not to attend; - say what you will do to compens

some countries invest a significant amount of money in promoting the use of bicycles. why do you think this is the case? Does it have a positive or a negative impact on individuals and the society?