More and more people no longer read newspapers. They get news about the world through the Internet. Do you think it is a negative or positive development?

#people #newspapers #news #world #internet #development

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Individuals today tend to be in touch with

news

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not from newspapers as it used to be, but from online

services

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Although

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this

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developed way is more convenient, it would not provide authentic or accurate data which

readers

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can rely on. Applying technologies to read

news

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provides us beneficial improvements

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

since it is comfortable.

Readers

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will be able to read

news

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at any time and everywhere

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

since they can do It through their smartphones.

Moreover

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, It would not be necessary to go and buy

news

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, since we can subscribe to online

services

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for free.

For example

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, when people want to read

news

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, they can just listen to it from podcasts

as well as

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read through their smartphones at any time and environment without any expenses.

Thus

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, current society tends to use online websites to take the

news

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, because of their conveniences.

On the other hand

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, there are several disadvantages, since

readers

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will not have any proof that the

news

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they are reading is authentic. These online

services

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only type data and publish,

while

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newspapers have some checkings on the truth of the information they have written. To be more precise, newspapers have rules about publishing only authentic data,

while

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online

services

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do not.

For example

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, when online

services

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type

news

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, they do not pay attention to facts or dates.

As a result

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readers

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may take incorrect information.

Therefore

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, online websites may not write authentic

news

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To conclude

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, there are

such

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advantages of using technologies for

news

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as time and money saving, and drawbacks like inaccuracy of online

news

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. If the

news

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on the internet was checked, we would believe them more.

Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on Mon Sep 02 2024

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task achievement

Your introduction clearly states the topic and your perspective, which is good. However, try to make your thesis statement stronger by briefly outlining the main points you will discuss in the essay.

coherence cohesion

To achieve higher coherence, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and flows smoothly. Use linking words and phrases to connect sentences and paragraphs better.

task achievement

Strengthen your examples to make them more specific and relevant. Instead of general statements, include data, studies, or specific scenarios to support your points.

coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph supports the main argument and avoids repetition. Summarize your main points in the conclusion more effectively.

coherence cohesion

The essay is well-organized into an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

task achievement

You have addressed both positive and negative aspects of getting news online, which shows a balanced perspective.

task achievement

Your arguments are generally clear and logical.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

271 words

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More and more people no longer read newspapers. They get news about the world through the Internet. Do you think it is a negative or positive development?

Your opinion

Nowadays more and more young people hold important positions in the government. Some people think that it is a good thing, while others argue that it is not suitable. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

SMore and more transitional companies are setting up their business operations in economically developing nations. In this essay, I will discuss about some benefits and drawbacks of the inhabitants who live in those countries.

Some people believ that professionals such as doctors and engineers should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.