Some people say that professional workers such as doctors, nurses and teachers who make a greater contribution to society should be paid more than sports athletes and entertainment stars. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some specialists suggest that in the
field
Fix the agreement mistake
fields
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of medicine, education and social jobs, workers should get paid more rather than
atletes
Correct your spelling
athletes
or entertainment stars. In
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
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i
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I
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will argue about
this
phenomenon with causes and examples. In my opinion,
this
affirmation
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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is true due
the
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to the
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big impact that medicine and education
has
Change the verb form
have
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in
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on
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society. In the
last
Submitted by marcodimonaco89 on

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task achievement
Make sure to fully develop each main point and provide specific supporting examples to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on your essay's structure by employing clear topic sentences for each paragraph. Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next.
coherence cohesion
Develop a more detailed and comprehensive introduction that clearly outlines your main points and sets the stage for the discussion.
task achievement
You have a clear opinion on the topic, which forms the basis of your argument.
task achievement
The essay attempts to introduce a structured response by identifying the profession categories you wish to discuss.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • contribution to society
  • public health
  • extensive education
  • significant debt
  • high levels of stress
  • responsibility
  • future generation
  • undervalued
  • long-term importance
  • market demand
  • entertainment industry
  • societal value
  • compensation system
  • income inequality
  • essential services
  • adequately staffed
  • resourced
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