Some people believe that participating in competitive sports can be beneficial for children, while others think it may have negative effects. What are the advantages and disadvantages of children participating in competitive sports?
Although
competitive sports
are thought by some to be a useful experience for children
, other people consider that it can be detrimental. Children
can learn to value competition
and gain self-confidence from taking part in sports
but there are also
drawbacks to be taken into account.
Firstly
, one benefit of children
taking part in competitive sports
is that they understand the value of competition
. When children
see a direct connection between hard work and success, they realize importance
of the sport. Add an article
the importance
Secondly
, participating in a game
is advantageous because children
can learn various skills like time management. Many sports
, for instance
, cricket and tennis, require them to make a whole day schedule for their practice. Thirdly
, children
can improve their confidence level while
playing against other teams. After winning a game
, they believe that they can achieve anything if they work hard to win a competition
.
On the other hand
, one problem when children
face a competition
in sports
is that they affect
by Wrong verb form
are affected
the
mental health. Correct article usage
apply
For example
, children
have more emphasis on winning a game
at any cost, they do not have an idea of failure. As a result
, they experience stress and depression if they do not win the game
. Another possible issue is that the time children
spend on
playing a sport prevents them from focusing on their schoolwork. Having a good education is the key to Change preposition
apply
successful
future so a child who participates in Correct article usage
a successful
sports
, they
would have Correct pronoun usage
apply
a
poor academic performance which can be harmful in the long run.
In conclusion, Correct article usage
apply
while
children
can benefit from being a part of a
competitive Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
sports
, it can also
lead to the problem of mental health or low grades at school.Submitted by parmarheena277254 on
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task achievement
Your essay responds well to the task, providing both advantages and disadvantages of children participating in competitive sports. However, to improve your score, ensure that each idea is developed more comprehensively. For example, expand on how time management skills are developed through sports.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is generally clear and organized, but there are some issues with logical flow. Some sentences could be better connected, and the transition between ideas should be smoother. Using more linking phrases and ensuring each paragraph flows logically from one to the next will improve coherence and cohesion.
coherence cohesion
Though your introduction and conclusion are generally effective, you could enhance them by making them more engaging and ensuring they comprehensively cover all points discussed in the essay. Make sure your conclusion doesn't just repeat the introduction but also summarizes the key points discussed.
task achievement
You have effectively introduced the topic and set the context for discussing both advantages and disadvantages of children participating in competitive sports. This contributes positively to the task response.
coherence cohesion
Your paragraphs are generally well-structured, with clear main ideas that are supported by examples. The structure of your essay shows a clear introduction, body, and conclusion, which aids in coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
Your essay covers relevant examples and includes various aspects of the topic, which contributes to a clear and comprehensible response. This helps in achieving a good task response.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?