Many people believe that it is easier to have a healthy lifestyle in the countryside. Others believe that there are health benefits of living in cities. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
The
large number of Change the article
A
population
consider living in the outskirts very healthy Add an article
the population
although
there are some who prefer the city lifestyle. Despite the accessibility of healthcare facilities in towns, I believe the
rural life is much better as there are plenty of healthy Correct article usage
apply
foods
.
On the one hand, there are health
advantages of living in the
urban areas Correct article usage
apply
such
as easy access to hospitals. In most countries, good clinics and hospitals with the most experienced doctors
and nurses are mainly found in the cities and they are very convenient. This
enables people to frequently go for medical check-ups as well as
immediately report any symptoms to their doctors
to avoid worsening of their conditions. Consequently
, they maintain a
good Remove the article
apply
health
and they always get best
tips from Correct article usage
the best
the
medical professors to stay fit.
Correct article usage
apply
On the other hand
, most people think that it is very easy to live a healthy lifestyle in the countryside as there are healthy foods
which are very affordable. As it is said, "prevention is better than cure", natural foods
that are not genetically modified prevent certain health
conditions such
as diabetes and heart diseases
. Fix the agreement mistake
disease
For example
, most people in the rurals
eat the food they produce like vegetables, natural oils from nuts and there Correct your spelling
rural
are
Change the verb form
is
variety
of fruits. Add an article
a variety
Additionally
, they have access to natural herbs that are highly recommended even by doctors
. This
keeps them in good health
and their frequency of hospitalisation is very slim compared to city lovers.
In conclusion, although
there are many healthcare facilities in the cities and good doctors
, I believe it is beneficial health wise
to live in the villages as there are Add a hyphen
health-wise
a
plenty of good Remove the article
apply
foods
and herbs to help them boost their immune system.Submitted by sisalt100 on
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task achievement
To further improve task response, aim to provide more balanced arguments for both perspectives. This allows the reader to see that you have considered both sides in depth before arriving at your conclusion. Try to elaborate a bit more on the health benefits of urban living.
coherence and cohesion
For better coherence, ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly to the next. Adding transition words or phrases can help to guide the reader through your essay and make it feel more cohesive.
coherence and cohesion
Revisit your sentences for minor grammatical errors and clarity. While small inaccuracies don't significantly lower your score, polishing these can elevate your overall level of writing.
task achievement
Excellent use of relevant examples, especially when discussing healthy foods in rural areas, which strengthens your argument.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, making the structure easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Main points are well-supported, and you make a strong case for the health benefits of living in the countryside.