Some people state that schools should have a social responsibility to encourage children not to eat junk food. Others believe that parents should take responsibility for their children's eating habits. Discuss both views and state your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is an ongoing debate over whether
schools
or
parents
should incentivize
children
not to consume fast
food
. Many individuals claim that it is the responsibility of
schools
though I think
parents
should be in charge of their
children
's eating. On the one hand, proponents of the view toward
schools
claim that academic institutions play a significant role in discouraging teenagers from intake of junk
food
. One of the considerable reasons is that
schools
might provide healthy nutrition education to students.
This
means that they might learn the drawbacks of these types of nourishment;
as a result
, they begin to consume less.
Additionally
,
schools
are able to provide more nutritious meals and snacks in canteens. The healthier options there are, the less adolescents consume fatty
food
.
For example
, in Turkey, academic institutions offer healthier
food
which encourages students to eat
this
kind of meal.
On the other hand
,
parents
should take responsibility for their
children
's intake habits. One of the obvious reasons is that
parents
might restrict
children
's access to junk
food
. If they limit their teens's consumption of fast
food
, adolescents are able to eat healthy foods.
Further
justification is that
parents
can teach their teenagers about healthy
food
choices from childhood. From my point of view, since youngsters had not eaten unhealthy
food
, they would not have a tendency to consume it.
For instance
, in Azerbaijan, more and more people educate their
children
about the possible disadvantages of it.
Hence
, these actions from adults can incentivize youngsters to intake fresh nourishment. In conclusion,
although
schools
have a profound impact on pupils' preferences regarding the consumption of junk
food
,
parents
play a vital role in managing their eating habits.
Furthermore
, I am of the opinion that adults might teach them in order to not consume
fat-contained
Correct your spelling
fat-containing
show examples
food
.
Submitted by ilkin.abdullaev04 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Make sure to fully explore both sides of the argument with balanced points and examples to show greater depth in your discussion.
coherence cohesion
While the essay is well-organized, consider adding more complex linking devices to improve cohesion and logical flow between sentences and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Clear introduction and conclusion are presented.
task achievement
The essay addresses all parts of the task with relevant main ideas and examples.
coherence cohesion
Good use of structure to make the essay easy to follow, with a logical sequence of ideas.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • social responsibility
  • encourage
  • junk food
  • nutrition education
  • nutritious meals
  • physical activities
  • role models
  • healthy food choices
  • access
  • create a healthy environment
  • primary responsibility
  • limit
  • responsibility
What to do next:
Look at other essays: