The diagram below shows how a biofuel called ethanol is produced.

The diagram below shows how a biofuel called ethanol is produced.
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The flow chart illustrates the way how biofuel called ethanol
manufactured
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is manufactured
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.
Overall
Linking Words
, there are 9 stages in the whole
fuel producing
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fuel-producing
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process, beginning with energy produced from sunlight and
carbon
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dioxide
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and ending with releasing
carbon
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dioxide
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from different
kind
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kinds
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of
transports
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transport
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.
To begin
Linking Words
with, the energy which consists
from
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of
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sunlight and
carbon
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dioxide
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consumed by
Verb problem
is
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absorbed by plants and trees to grow
up
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apply
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.
Then
Linking Words
, the grown crops are harvested by huge
tractor
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tractors
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.
After
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, the harvested crops are passed through
pre-processing
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a pre-processing
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machine which
break
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breaks
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up
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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into small pieces until the cellulose has been produced.
Next,
Linking Words
processing
Verb problem
apply
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cellulose with chemical elements in
laboratory
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the laboratory
a laboratory
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are manufactured sugars which main
component
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components
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of producing ethanol.
Following
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, microbes are added to the sugar, and
this
Linking Words
mixture is turned into biofuel.
Finally
Linking Words
, the ethanol consumed by planes, lorries and cars
which are producing
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produces
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carbon
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dioxide
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and
recycling
Wrong verb form
recycles
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the process again.
Submitted by writingiletschecker on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words carbon, dioxide with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • biomass
  • ethanol
  • fermentation
  • microorganisms
  • yeast
  • carbon dioxide
  • distillation
  • purification
  • dehydration
  • raw materials
  • storage
  • distribution
  • renewable energy
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • sustainable fuel
  • concentration
  • impurities
  • alcohol content
  • crop growth
  • conversion process
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