IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think the cheap air flight gives ordinary people more freedom. However, others think the cheap air flight should be banned because it polluted the air and brings many other problems. Discuss both view and give your opinions.

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Nowadays, individuals consider choosing an
unexpensive
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inexpensive
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air
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flight
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 for multiple reasons. People address that cheap
air
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flight
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 provides freedom
while
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 others argue
its
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it is
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 inconvenient
air
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flight
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 and should be blocked for critical
issues
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 it includes.
This
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 essay will propose the benefits and
drawbacks
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 of
inconveniente
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inconvenience
inconvenient
air
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flight
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companies
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 as the
drawbacks
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surpasses
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surpass
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 the benefits. On one hand, individuals tend to choose cheap
air
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flight
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companies
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 for several reasons. Because poor quality plane
scheduale
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schedule
 their journies during all
the
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apply
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day, it
considered
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was considered
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 a remarkable choice for them.
For example
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, many airports have addressed that people
whom
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who
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 want to buy a ticket usually buy it 2 hours before the plane
start
Correct subject-verb agreement
starts
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 moving.
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While freelancers
Correct word choice
Freelancers
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 consider taking a full plane without other passengers, makes it a fabulous choice for them
which
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when
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 other fancy
companies
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 may have restricted planes. Saudi Arabia reported recently about many freelancers
whom
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who
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 own planes
undercharge
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under charge
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 of poor quality
companies
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.
On the other hand
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, there are
issues
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 of choosing a cheap fight, so people address their opinion
as
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that
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 it should be banned for environmental causes. Environmental problems may cause
a
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apply
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severe
issues
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 that harm the atmosphere
,
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and, as
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as a consequence
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affects
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affect
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 the population's health. Numerous
academeic
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academic
 media articles have shown that after the cheap
flight
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companies
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 increased the pollution increased
as a result
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.
Moreover
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,
its
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it's
it is
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 not just an
enironmental
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environmental
 problem but
also
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 a severe health
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issues
Fix the agreement mistake
issue
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,
due to
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 not fully trained pilots they tend to commit a lot of accidents. It should be banned
due to
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 the unavoidable problems that it
responsible
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is responsible
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 for. In conclusion, in the short term poor
air
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Use synonyms
flight
Fix the agreement mistake
flights
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 provide a good
seveses
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service
 that makes it
better
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a better
the better
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 choice for travellers,
however
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, there are unavoidable
drawbacks
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 that could cause. It
include
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includes
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a severe
Correct the article-noun agreement
severe drawbacks
a severe drawback
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drawbacks
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 related to
environment
Add an article
the environment
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 that
makes
Correct subject-verb agreement
make
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 it vitally important to be banned.

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task achievement
The essay presents both sides of the argument, but the ideas are not fully developed. More specific examples and detailed explanations are needed to strengthen the points made.
coherence cohesion
The essay shows a general logical structure, but there are issues with cohesion. Transitions between ideas and paragraphs are not always smooth, making the argument harder to follow.
general
There are several grammatical and spelling errors which affect readability. Proofreading and practicing grammar exercises can help improve the clarity of the writing.
task achievement
The essay successfully addresses both sides of the argument as required by the task.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present and provide some framing for the essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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