Popular events like the Football World Cup and other international sporting occasions are essential in easing international tension and releasing patriotic emotions in a safe way. To what extent do you agree?

#events #football #world #cup #occasions #tension #emotions

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Due to

Linking Words

the rapid growth of technology, the world has come a long way. Sports play a vital role in our lives. It helps us to stay fit not only physically but

also

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mentally . In the present scenario, international sports platforms

such

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as FIFA, Olympics, IPL etc become way too popular . A school of folks believe that

such

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popular events are essential for these generations as it's help to ease international tension

as well as

Linking Words

help them to relax . In the upcoming monograph, I will delve into the assertion and elaborate

Change preposition

on my

show examples

point of view regarding

this

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issue .

Submitted by shyamal017 on Tue Sep 03 2024

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coherence cohesion

Your introduction provides a good overview but could benefit from a clearer thesis statement outlining your stance.

task achievement

Using specific examples to support your points will make your argument stronger and more convincing.

coherence cohesion

The introduction covers the topic well and sets up the essay.

task achievement

The ideas presented are clear and easy to understand.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

1 paragraphs

102 words

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Popular events like the Football World Cup and other international sporting occasions are essential in easing international tension and releasing patriotic emotions in a safe way. To what extent do you agree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Too much emphasis is given to education on the young. More government money should be spent on the free time activity of young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays many people have access to computers on a wide basis and a large number of children play computer games. What are the negative impacts of playing computer games and what can be done to minimize the bad effects?

TASK 2 (Academic and General Training) You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Many people have difficulty maintaining a healthy diet. What are the causes of this problem? How could it be solved? Write at least 250 words.

Demand for food is increasing worldwide. what are Causes and Solutions for this problem?

Some people think that zoos are cruel and should be closed down. Others, however, believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals. Discuss both views and give your opinion.