Many countries offer a free health care system to their citizens rather than relying on private health care. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of having a free system, and give your opinion.
In recent times variety of
many
nations present Correct word choice
apply
free if charge
Correct your spelling
free-of-charge
health
services for their people instead
of offering them private health
care . In my opinion , I considered
that providing free Wrong verb form
consider
healthcare
for civilians can bring more benefits to communities and countries
.
To begin
with, healthcare
Correct article usage
the healthcare
systems
is the most essential part of any Fix the agreement mistake
system
nations
because it play Fix the agreement mistake
nation
major
role Add an article
a major
the major
of
developing Change preposition
in
countries
and incomes , for example
, GCC countries
whose
provide Correct pronoun usage
that
healthcare
facilities for free attract foreign workers and investment to help them towards their goals to build and improve the economy.
On the other hand
, Private hospitals
and health
units are less beneficiary for people than government hospitals
healthcare
in may
cities . Correct your spelling
many
It
Add a verb
It is
It was
also
possible to say that private health
clinics are more toward cosmatic
procedures Correct your spelling
cosmetic
while
public hospitals
are more focused on health
of individuals which is the main Add an article
the health
concerned
. Replace the word
concern
For instance
, In some of Africa
poor areas private Change noun form
Africa's
hospitals
are not good
idea Add an article
a good
due to
variety
of different kinds of diseases Correct article usage
the variety
also
citizens don't get enough money to pay for their medical expenses.
In conclusion, Having government hospitals
which got support from their countries
which
forced Correct pronoun usage
apply
on
Change preposition
apply
human kind
Correct your spelling
humankind
health
rather than relying on private hospitals
that cannot provide the same benefits that government hospitals
do.Submitted by may.al.zemami on
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task achievement
To improve your task response, ensure that you fully address all parts of the prompt. While you mentioned advantages and disadvantages, more examples and specific explanations would provide a more complete response.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, working on the logical flow of your essay will help. Use more transitional phrases to connect your ideas smoothly.
introduction conclusion present
A clear opinion was expressed in the introduction, which provides a strong start to your essay.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively reiterates the main points and reinforces your opinion.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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