In many countries today, there are concerns about the unhealthy lifestyles that people lead. What health issues are linked to modern lifestyles? What answers to these problems can you suggest? Give reasons for your answer, and support your essay with ideas and examples from your own experience.
In
this
era, majority
of nations are suffering from Correct article usage
the majority
unhealthy
Add an article
an unhealthy
lifestyle
which Fix the agreement mistake
lifestyles
are
causing Change the verb form
is
plothera
of Correct your spelling
plethora
health related
issues. In Add a hyphen
health-related
this
essay, I am explain
some major Wrong verb form
explaining
cause
happen with Fix the agreement mistake
causes
this
lifestyle and providing some solution
that can help to control Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
this
major concern.
To begin
with, obesity is one of the major issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
this
modern lifestyle. Modern technology is making forks more Change preposition
in this
lathergic
and lazy. Correct your spelling
lethargic
For instance
, the university
of Capitalize word
University
toronto
Change the capitalization
Toronto
provide
Change the verb form
provides
a
data in which they Correct article usage
apply
says
the percentage of overweight people Change the verb form
say
incresed
by 11% in 2024 Correct your spelling
increased
comparied
to 2021. Correct your spelling
compared
Hence
, obesity is becoming the biggest problem
for major health problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
such
as heart attack
.
Fix the agreement mistake
attacks
Additional
, another important factor of modern Change the word
Additionally
life
is Correct article usage
the overusage
overusage
of Correct your spelling
overuse
moblie
which Correct your spelling
mobile
effect
the human body Verb problem
affects
with
numerous ways. Change preposition
in
For example
, it effects
the eye side of forks Replace the word
affects
Change preposition
at in
in
early age and Correct your spelling
an
lead
to a serious Change the verb form
leads
problem
. In recent studies, Time of india
Change the capitalization
India
show
, Correct subject-verb agreement
shows
70
% of children Correct word choice
that 70
needs
Change the verb form
need
eye glasses
in their teenage.
To protect Correct your spelling
eyeglasses
world
from Add an article
the world
this
major problem
, people should start changing their life
. Fix the agreement mistake
lives
Individual
should not Add an article
An individual
The individual
start
Add the particle
start to
depend
their whole chores on electronic Wrong verb form
depending
devies
. Correct your spelling
devices
For example
, less usage of moble
helps to stay active which can help to control their obesity Correct your spelling
mobile
problem
as well as
helps to control eye sight
issues.
In my opinion, modern Correct your spelling
eyesight
technolgy
helps to make human Correct your spelling
technology
life
easy, but overusage
of any things Correct your spelling
overuse
become
harmful Correct subject-verb agreement
becomes
for
human Change preposition
to
life
.Submitted by taniamall786 on
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coherence cohesion
To improve your score, work on developing a clearer logical structure for your essay. Use topic sentences to clearly introduce each paragraph's main idea.
task achievement
Ensure that your main points are fully and clearly explained. Some ideas in your essay lack development and clarity.
task achievement
Pay attention to your use of examples. Make sure they are clearly connected to the point you are trying to make.
language accuracy
Working on your grammar and vocabulary will help improve the overall clarity and coherence of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in understanding the main points you are making.
task achievement
You address multiple aspects of the topic, including both problems and potential solutions, which shows a comprehensive approach.
task achievement
Your examples, although needing clearer connection, show that you are attempting to support your points with concrete evidence.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.