It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #money #future

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

We are standing at the new dawn of the developed world.

Therefore

Linking Words

, some people suppose that saving money for the future is crucial for everyone including young

residents

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

essay will present some reasons why I am partly convinced by

this

Linking Words

statement. On the one hand, there are some benefits when people save money for the future. First of all, nowadays, there is very little reasonable housing for

residents

Use synonyms

or next generations to purchase.

Besides

Linking Words

, all goods and amenities or services are more expensive than in the past.

Therefore

Linking Words

, saving is necessary for everybody to obtain anything.

In addition

Linking Words

, having more savings can help inhabitants carry out their plans without concern and be more comfortable.

For example

Linking Words

, some youngsters want to travel to different nations or study abroad without scholarships.

Hence

Linking Words

, if they can have an available income from saving, they can easily conduct their intentions above.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, there are some issues that need to be paid attention to.

First,

Linking Words

saving can sometimes cause problems

due to

Linking Words

misunderstandings about it. Some

residents

Use synonyms

misunderstand between thrift and stinginess and they begin to save too much.

Therefore

Linking Words

, it can lead to a decrease in the quality of life.

For instance

Linking Words

, some

residents

Use synonyms

suppose that it is wasting to use medical services or buy fresh foods.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, they begin to use poor services or gain food of unknown origin at cheap prices that can cause many diseases. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

I agree that all people especially youngsters should have a safe salary for their future intentions, from my perspective, they

also

Linking Words

need to use money at a reasonable criteria for now.

Submitted by ieltswritingpracticedl on Wed Sep 04 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Your introduction clearly states your position and provides context for the essay. However, try to make your thesis statement a bit clearer on whether you fully agree or just partly agree, to enhance clarity.

task achievement

You have addressed the task appropriately, but ensure that your main points are expanded upon with more detailed examples. This will strengthen your argument and make your essay more persuasive.

task achievement

While you have good ideas, the explanation of counterarguments can be elaborate and comparing both views more effectively can add depth to your essay. Consider balancing the discussion by equally emphasizing the points for and against.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a logical structure with clear introduction and conclusion elements. Focus on enhancing the flow between paragraphs by adding transition words and phrases that can guide the reader through your arguments more smoothly.

coherence cohesion

While your main ideas are supported, they could be developed more fully. Try to provide more evidence and examples for your points, rather than general statements.

coherence cohesion

Minimize grammatical errors and try to use more varied sentence structures. This effort will help make your writing more engaging and polished.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion are both present and provide a good sense of structure to your essay.

task achievement

The essay covers the task well, addressing both sides of the argument and giving a fair viewpoint.

task achievement

You have identified and explained some key points effectively, contributing to a clear overall direction for your essay.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

271 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

financial security
safety net
unforeseen circumstances
emergencies
future investments
retirement planning
financial discipline
habit of saving
amassing wealth
substantial fund
opportunity cost
additional income
inflation
purchasing power

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
You have just received an invitation to an art exhibition. You would like more details about the event before you decide to go. Write a letter to the organiser asking for more details. In your letter • thank them for the invitation • ask what kind of art will be on display and the size of each section • ask if any of the artists will be present
I am very excited to read your letter but I would like to reply to the invitation because I need a detailed plan.
4.5
band
Families who send their children to private schools should not be required to pay taxes that support the state education system. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
While many people agree that the parents sending their sons or daughters to learning in schools should not pay on taxes for supporting the educational system of regions, many argues that it is impartial denying their taxes. In my view, I totally agree with the former view and the reasons why I agree with that statement will be discussed in this essay.
7
band
It is sometimes argued that too many students go to university, while others claim that a university education should be a universal right.
In some advanced countries, it is not unusual for more than 50% of young adults to attend college or university. Critics, however, claim that many university courses are worthless and young people would be better off gaining skills in the workplace. In this essay, I will examine both sides of this argument and try to reach a conclusion.
6
band
There is a trend of increasing amounts of consumer goods, which leads to environmental problems. What are the reasons for this trend? Give your own opinion and solutions.
There is a trend of increasing amounts of consumer goods, which leads to environmental problems. What are the reasons for this trend? Give your own opinion and solutions. With the time demand for things increasing it does not illustrate any possibility of lowering it needs. The modern man does require more staff than ever before, which causes difficulties in delivering them in that extreme amount as well as cheap industrial production. In this essay, I will talk about why those wants have been raised, open a few reasons for that and a couple of potential solutions to eliminate the cause.
<4
band
In the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study their own country. Nowadays, they have more opportunity to study abroad. Do advantage of this development outweigh this disadvantages.
In the few years, students obtained a university degree, they studied in their country. these days, they have several opportunities to complete their education through other cities. I strongly believe that the benefits of study abroad outweigh the drawbacks because studying outside in other country aids to improve their education.

It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Families who send their children to private schools should not be required to pay taxes that support the state education system. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

It is sometimes argued that too many students go to university, while others claim that a university education should be a universal right.

There is a trend of increasing amounts of consumer goods, which leads to environmental problems. What are the reasons for this trend? Give your own opinion and solutions.

In the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study their own country. Nowadays, they have more opportunity to study abroad. Do advantage of this development outweigh this disadvantages.