Social media, such as Facebook, Twitter, are replacing face – to – face contact in this century. Do you think the advantage of this way outweigh the disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Social
media
has
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
changed
people
's behaviour
to interact
Change preposition
in interacting
show examples
each
Change preposition
with each
show examples
other as
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
face-to-face communication
does
Verb problem
is
show examples
not compulsory anymore. I believe that
this
will give many advantages as increasing the effectiveness
to conduct
Change preposition
of conducting
show examples
meeting
Fix the agreement mistake
meetings
show examples
and contributing to
reduce
Change the verb form
reducing
show examples
carbon emissions in
travels
Fix the agreement mistake
travel
show examples
as well. First of all, social
media
has made meetings can be conducted effectively. Previously,
people
required
Add a missing verb
were required
show examples
to spare their time for mobilisation
for moving
Change preposition
to move
show examples
to another meeting. But now,
people
can move to another meeting
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
one
click on their screen.
This
can reduce our lead time which is beneficial for
people
who have busy agendas that usually require more time for mobilisation.
This
fact has been proven from several testimonies that they can add
one
or more agendas during their working hours
due to
online
meeting
Fix the agreement mistake
meetings
show examples
.
Furthermore
, replacing physical
meeting
Fix the agreement mistake
meetings
show examples
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
online
meeting
Fix the agreement mistake
meetings
show examples
contributes to
reduce
Change the verb form
reducing
show examples
carbon emissions in travelling. It is because travelling for business purposes is
one
of the most frequent reasons to travel that contributes
one
Change preposition
to one
show examples
of
largest
Correct article usage
the largest
show examples
emissions, especially international travel. Currently, it is not an urge to have
face to face
Add a hyphen
face-to-face
show examples
meetings because it has been
accomodated
Correct your spelling
accommodated
by using social
media
.
For instance
, a conference involving international participants can be conducted by using online meeting apps,
such
as Google Meet or Zoom without requiring
to
Correct pronoun usage
them to
show examples
physically attend. In conclusion, social
media
has many good influences
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
people
's
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
because it helps
people
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
conduct
meeting
Fix the agreement mistake
meetings
show examples
effectively and preserve the environment, particularly on travelling.
Hence
, the benefits of using social
media
will outweigh the drawbacks.
Submitted by bhaswarawira on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

relevant specific examples
Try to include more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. For instance, you could mention a company that has successfully reduced travel costs and emissions through online meetings.
complete response
To enhance the task response, ensure that you address potential disadvantages of social media replacing face-to-face contact, even if briefly. This would make your argument more balanced and thorough.
clear comprehensive ideas
Ensure clarity by varying sentence structures and using complex sentences. For example, instead of 'social media has made meetings can be conducted effectively,' you could say, 'social media has enabled more effective conduct of meetings.'
logical structure
The essay demonstrates a clear and logical structure, making it easy for the reader to follow the arguments.
introduction conclusion present
You have effectively introduced and concluded your argument, ensuring a cohesive progression of ideas.
supported main points
Main points are well-supported with relevant arguments, particularly regarding the reduction of travel time and carbon emissions.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: