In many countires women no longer feel the need to get married. Some people believe that this is because women are able to earn their own income and, therefore, do not require the financial security that marriage can bring. Do you agree or disagree?

#countires #women #people #income #security #marriage

The minds of the female population in the world about marriage

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

changing, the outcome is that the quantity of people that choose

wedding

Fix the agreement mistake

weddings

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is reducing all

arround

Correct your spelling

around

the

word

Correct your spelling

world

show examples

. In

this

essay

Add a comma

essay,

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we will see why

this

Change the article

apply

show examples

positive and is making

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

women

more happy,

financial

Change the adjective

financially

show examples

secure and improving their lives.

Firstly

, the cultural change of our population allows the

women

elect

Fix the infinitive

to elect

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if they want to get married or not. Nowadays,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

forced marriage or the pressure of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society to get married is almost

inexsistent

Correct your spelling

inexistent

nonexistent

. A classical example of

that is

that in our times, a woman can live all her life without

beeing

Correct your spelling

being

married, and

that is

not a shame anymore.

Thus

, reducing

this

social pressure is allowing

woman

Fix the agreement mistake

women

show examples

to choose if they really want to celebrate a wedding or not.

Secondly

, the economic independence of the

women

means that a woman

Change the verb form

does

show examples

not need to get married to secure an income. In our days, the female population is allowed to study, work, open a bank account and buy

propieties

Correct your spelling

properties

proprieties

. That was different before.

For example

, in Spain

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

women

can

Wrong verb form

could

show examples

not open a bank account until 1974.

As a result

, adult females at

this

time can have their own money, and do not need

a men

Correct the article-noun agreement

a man

men

show examples

for sustent. In conclusion, the descent of marriages is

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

good

new

Correct your spelling

news

show examples

with

Change preposition

show examples

the social position of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

women

. At the moment,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

adult females can have their own sustent,

live

Correct word choice

and live

show examples

without the

necesity

Correct your spelling

necessity

a men

Correct the article-noun agreement

men

a man

show examples

to earn money.

As a result

women

are more independent, more happy and

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

most important, will choose if they want to get married or not.

Submitted by pabloenriquevicente on Thu Sep 05 2024

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task achievement

While you have addressed the task adequately, some ideas lack depth. Provide more detailed examples or elaboration to strengthen your arguments.

coherence cohesion

Ensure the topic sentences of your paragraphs clearly introduce the main ideas, and make sure all sentences within a paragraph support that main idea. This will improve the logical structure of your essay.

coherence cohesion

Work on sentence structures, grammar, and word choices to enhance clarity and reduce minor errors. This will make your points clearer and more persuasive.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively set the stage and summarize your arguments.

task achievement

You did well in recognizing and addressing key points related to women's financial independence and societal changes as reasons for the decline in marriage rates.

Your opinion

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

276 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In many countires women no longer feel the need to get married. Some people believe that this is because women are able to earn their own income and, therefore, do not require the financial security that marriage can bring. Do you agree or disagree?

Your opinion

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Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Other believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these view and give your own opinion.

TSome people believe that one of the best ways to solve environmental problem is to increase the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that success in life comes trom hard work and determination, while others think hot there are more infortant factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.