Some people think that governments should give financial support to creative artists such as painters and musicians. Others believe that creative artist should be funded by alternative sources. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Creativity is the reflection of mental thinking and observation. The majority of society thinks that the creators must supported by the
government
while
others oppose it and believe that artists are funded by other alternative sources. In my opinion, I firmly believe that abstract artists are sponsored by higher authorities. The following paragraph sheds light on both perspectives. On the one hand, in previous centuries it had seemed that
people
earned
money
to portray a King and queen.
However
, artist express the world from their painting so they need funding to do
such
huge projects or maintain the heritage of the country.
Additionally
, art is the identity of culture, but unfortunately, it is not considered any employment
but
Correct word choice
apply
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people
need
money
to
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
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the
Change the word
their
show examples
life resources. So
that is
why, the
government
arranges competitions and prizes for the winner and volunteers.
For instance
, in February 2024 a famous artist made a portrait of King Charles and received a good picture that implied an example for others.
Furthermore
, the
government
should make art school to learn about music, painting and the use of types of equipment.
Consequently
, I believe that the organization provides the backbone for the artist. Probing ahead, some argue that musician receives
money
from their concert so they never need any funding from the
government
because it is a waste of resources. The authorities should take care of other aspects like health care, education, eco-friendly environment.
For instance
, in Japan,
people
work day and night and they never waste
money
on abstract things because they invest in exploration and make life more and more modern.
to sum up
, both aspects are right but
people
should work on cultural things and make memories to tell the upcoming foster about life. The
government
should facilitate artists.
Submitted by alviusman18 on

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Ensure that your introduction clearly outlines the two sides of the argument and your opinion in a more structured manner. This will help improve the clarity of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Work on your paragraph structure. Try to make clear, distinct points in separate paragraphs to improve the logical flow of your essay.
task achievement
Use more relevant and specific examples to support your arguments. This can help strengthen your essay and make your points more convincing.
task achievement
The introduction includes a statement of the topic and your opinion, which sets the stage for the essay.
task achievement
The essay presents both sides of the argument, which helps in addressing the task comprehensively.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains logical arguments and some relevant examples to back up the points made.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial support
  • creative artists
  • painters
  • musicians
  • cultural heritage
  • economic pressures
  • public investment
  • national reputation
  • tourism
  • economic benefits
  • equal opportunities
  • diverse backgrounds
  • private funding
  • competitive
  • merit-based
  • taxpayers
  • essential services
  • healthcare
  • education
  • sponsorships
  • grants
  • crowdfunding
  • innovation
  • entrepreneurship
  • commercially aware
  • self-sufficient
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