At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantage of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
A significant
Correct quantifier usage
number of rice
rice
in Correct your spelling
rise
population
has been noticed Correct article usage
the population
the
Correct article usage
apply
world wide
. Some countries have Correct your spelling
worldwide
low
number of citizens Change the article
a low
the low
while
others includer
Correct your spelling
include
included
a huge numbers
of Correct the article-noun agreement
huge numbers
a huge number
population
. It has been stated that some nations have Add an article
the population
wide
range of Add an article
a wide
Youngsters
in comparision
Correct your spelling
comparison
of
Senion citizens. Change preposition
to
This
situation has both pros and cons. In my opinion, after analyzing the current happenings, this
has more drawbacks than the
advantages which will be explained in the Correct article usage
apply
further
essay.
Firstly
, Youth is called warm-blood, and they are responsible for the growth of the country in the future. For instance
, today's generation have
been so advanced in Change the verb form
has
the
technology Correct article usage
apply
as well as
in extra curricular
activities based on their skills. Correct your spelling
extracurricular
This
is a huge advantage of having Young people in the country which can results
in the Change the verb form
result
overall
country
development. Change noun form
country's
moreover
, people believe that the young blood is the future of the world.
However
, the main drawback of having a huge number of youngsters
is, they
are not connected with the religion and the rituals. Correct word choice
that they
For example
, in the modern era, juniors are loosing
Replace the word
losing
interests
in treating an elderly person nicely and respectfully. They forgot their roots and manners in show-off. Fix the agreement mistake
interest
Furthermore
, we do not have enough space to build new houses for living. So, with increase
in Add an article
an increase
the increase
population
, living expenses are
Change the verb form
are also becoming
are also become
also
became expensive.
To conclude
, population
of young people is required to beat the other nations in technology and in inventions. Add an article
the population
In contrast
, having too many of
Change preposition
apply
Youngsters
may lead in
Change preposition
to
population
growth because of low
dying ratio. Correct article usage
a low
Overall
, after thorough
analysis Correct article usage
a thorough
on
the situation, it can be stated that the advantages of having a large number of Change preposition
of
youngsters
does not
not outweigh the disadvantages.Verb problem
do
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task achievement
You should focus on grammatical accuracy, especially in sentence structure and word choice. For example, 'A significant rice in population' should be 'A significant rise in population' and 'includer a huge numbers of' should be 'include a huge number of'.
supported main points
You should provide more specific and relevant examples to support your points. For example, when discussing technology advancements, try to mention specific fields or innovations.
logical structure
Work on improving the logical flow of your arguments. Ensure that each paragraph naturally follows the previous one to make your essay more coherent.
introduction conclusion present
Your essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame and wrap up your arguments effectively.
complete response
You have acknowledged both advantages and disadvantages, showing a balanced understanding of the topic.
logical structure
The main idea in each paragraph is identifiable, which helps in understanding your stance on the topic.