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Writing Samples
Band 4

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rathe than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#experts #children #language #school #rathe #outweigh
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Many people suggest that teaching young students a second
language
 is better to be from primary
school
 rather than secondary
school
. In
this
 essay, I will be mentioning the advantages and the disadvantages of
this
 view. On the one hand, studying a foreign
language
 from a very young age will help
children
 to understand it easier than learning it older age.
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
 minds in primary
school
 will be very clear and more able to learn and understand new things,
because
Correct word choice
and because
show examples
 of that they can learn faster and improve their skills better.
On the other hand
, primary
school
 students are too young to learn too many things in a short period of time
as well as
 their minds.
As a result
 , they may face many learning issues because
children
 at
this
 age are more into doing physical activities than site and learning a new
language
.
Also
, a conflict could happen with their first and second
language
 when they try to learn them together. In conclusion,
children
 in primary
school
 should be playing and doing many activities that are related to non-academic subjects more than studying hard things that belong to languages and other academic courses.
Submitted by khoulaalshanfari on

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples or evidence to support your points. For instance, you could mention studies that show children learn languages faster at a younger age.
coherence and cohesion
Improve transitions between paragraphs. For example, use phrases like 'Furthermore', 'Moreover', 'However', and 'In addition' to connect your ideas better.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid minor grammatical errors such as 'their minds' which might be unnecessary. Instead, use 'because their minds.'
task achievement
The essay presents both advantages and disadvantages of teaching children a foreign language at a young age.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clear and concise.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cognitive development
  • Primary school
  • Foreign language acquisition
  • Phonetic flexibility
  • Cultural immersion
  • Global citizenship
  • Enhanced academic performance
  • Early exposure
  • Pronunciation
  • Language pedagogy
  • Bilingual education
  • Resource allocation
  • Curriculum planning
  • Mother tongue
  • Native language competence
  • Language proficiency
  • Workload management
What to do next:
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