parents are putting a lot of pressure on their children to succeed. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Nowadays
parents
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think their
children
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must be
success
Replace the word
successful
show examples
in every moment. In order to
achive
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achieve
the pinnacle
postion
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position
in their life ,
parents
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foster
children
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to do
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lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
of things . I think
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pressure
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the pressure
show examples
on their
children
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leads to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
detrimental effects on
children
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rather than the
postive
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positive
aspect.
Firstly
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, one of the significant
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
for people who put
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lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
of
pressure
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is
that
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
social status. To be more precise, nowadays competition
between
Change preposition
in
show examples
the community has
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased ,
thus
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guardians
thing
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think
show examples
that attaining
higher
Correct article usage
a higher
show examples
rate
in
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of
show examples
education and
achiveing
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achieving
other
sport
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sports
show examples
activities that will give
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
honour in
the
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apply
show examples
society, not only to the
adalocents
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adolescents
but
also
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to them in society. In order to get
such
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kind of things
parents
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order to do
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lot
Correct article usage
a lot
show examples
workloads
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of workloads
show examples
that can not be
tolerable
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tolerated
show examples
by students.
For instance
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, my friend
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is not well at
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dance
Add an article
the dance
a dance
show examples
but her mother likes
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dance
Add the particle
to dance
show examples
, so she took her to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
dance
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class day and night but she can not
dance
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well
due to
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the
Change the word
her
show examples
lack of interest. I think, putting
pressure
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on the
children
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willl
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will
affect dramatically on their mental health.
In other words
Linking Words
, when
parents
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always comply to study that badly
effects
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affects
show examples
them since it gives
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lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
of mental
pressure
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it may
be leads
Change the verb form
lead
show examples
to danger for their lives
also
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.
For example
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,
last
Linking Words
week I saw
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
news on social media,
a
Correct word choice
that a
show examples
girl
Correct pronoun usage
who attempt
show examples
attempt
Replace the word
attempted
show examples
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
suicide
as
Correct word choice
because
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she
coundn't
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couldn't
enter the medicine .
Furthurmore
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Furthermore
, students
likely
Add a missing verb
are likely
show examples
to be engaging in
the
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apply
show examples
illegal activities
such
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as cheating in
the
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apply
show examples
exams and blaming
the
Change the word
their
show examples
parents
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, which activities
becoming
Wrong verb form
become
show examples
endengerd
Correct your spelling
endangered
for their lives.
For instance
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, if
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
student catching
while
Linking Words
he is cheating in the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
exams in my country they
banned
Wrong verb form
ban
show examples
to sit
Add an article
the exam
an exam
show examples
exam
Fix the agreement mistake
exams
show examples
. for 5 years.
To conclude
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,
parents
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putting on
Wrong verb form
put
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so
many
Correct quantifier usage
much
show examples
stress on their
children
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due to
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the
Change the word
their
show examples
personal status , but it
cause
Verb problem
apply
show examples
always negative impact
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
chilren
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children
since that leads to
youngesters
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youngsters
in a negative way. So,
parents
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should take some feasible measures to tackle these kinds of mistakes in
the
Change the word
their
show examples
Use synonyms
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
life.
Submitted by jivenica1998 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
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Your main ideas and arguments are clear, and you touched upon several valid points regarding the negative impacts of parental pressure.
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