IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to university, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. Do you agree or disagree ?

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Nowadays, there is a discussion about the lack of teaching practical
skills
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in
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at
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 all levels of education, and some people ask for more development of practical
skills
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 and
less
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fewer
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 teaching facts. In
this
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 essay, we will discuss why is
necessary
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important
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 the
teaching of
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teach
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 hands-on dexterity to improve the
developing
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development
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 of the alumni and how
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this
Correct determiner usage
these
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skills
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 will be practical in the future.
Firstly
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, learning practical abilities will
enchance
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enhance
 the fine
motors
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motor
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skills
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 of the children,
thus
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 ensuring a better development of their
body
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bodies
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.
For example
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, learning
carpintery
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carpentry
carpenter
 or cooking will let the child
to
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apply
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practice
te
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the
show examples
 fine
motors
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motor
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skills
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 of their hands.
As a result
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 of
this
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, the undergraduates will have a better
propioception
Correct your spelling
proprioception
 and will ensure that all their body
habilites
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habits
 will be developed, helping in the process of growing up.
Secondly
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, the practical
habilities
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abilities
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 that can be
teach
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taught
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 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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primary and secondary education will be vital in their future. A classical example of
that is
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 cooking lessons and financial lessons. When the majority of graduates
came
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come
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 out to the real world, they
lack
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lacked
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this
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 kind of
knowledgement
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acknowledgement
,
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that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 is
absoluty
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absolutely
 necessary to have
an
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their
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 own
idependent
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independent
 life.
As a consequence
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, a lot of alumni
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
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 start living on their own
,
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apply
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has
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have
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troubles
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trouble
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 with
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this
Correct determiner usage
these
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 very basic life
skills
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.
To conclude
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, the teaching of practical
skills
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 in the classrooms is almost non-existent.
Thus
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, a lot of students left the educational system without any type of hands-on habilites, resulting in a poor development of their bodies and affecting their future
live
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lives
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. To resolve
on
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apply
show examples
this
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 problem, we need to start including practical-life subjects in our schools.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay follows a clear and logical structure with well-defined paragraphs. Each paragraph should contain one main idea that supports your overall argument.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetition of ideas and ensure a variety of sentence structures to make your essay more engaging.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your main points. This will help demonstrate a thorough understanding of the topic and strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Work on the accuracy of vocabulary and grammar to avoid small errors that might detract from your essay's overall quality.
task achievement
To achieve better clarity, carefully proofread your essay to catch any minor mistakes or awkward phrasing.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clearly presented, framing the argument effectively.
task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt well and provides a complete response to the task, discussing why practical skills are necessary and how they can be beneficial in the future.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • theoretical knowledge
  • practical application
  • real-world skills
  • memorization of facts
  • demonstration of understanding
  • technological change
  • problem-solving
  • teamwork
  • hands-on experience
  • internships
  • project-based learning
  • curricula
  • entrepreneurship
  • adaptive workforce
What to do next:
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