At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults compared with the number of older people. Do the advantage outweigh the disadvantage?

#time #population #countries #adults #people #advantage

Contries

Correct your spelling

Countries

with a high number of young

adults

compared to older

people

doesn't

Change the verb form

don't

show examples

necisseraly

Correct your spelling

necessarily

mean

its

Correct your spelling

it's

show examples

a disadvantage to the community. Young

adults

are known to be the

people

of the future. Younger

adults

are more capable and understanding than older

people

in many ways which

make

Correct subject-verb agreement

makes

show examples

this

and

Correct your spelling

show examples

advantage. On one hand, young

adults

are more likely to understand the modern world,

social

Correct word choice

and social

show examples

media, and

simply

Add a missing verb

are simply

show examples

more educated

due to

the new educational systems. That does not mean that older

people

aren't educated, they are simply just not used to

these

Correct determiner usage

this

show examples

stuff like social media.

However

, older

people

are more experienced in life.

Specially

Replace the word

Especially

show examples

that

Correct word choice

since

show examples

there is a retirement age, older

people

wont

Add an apostrophe

won't

show examples

be able to work

therefor

Correct your spelling

therefore

show examples

giving chances to those who are younger benefiting the country.

On the other hand

, when

people

grow old they find difficulties doing

sertain

Correct your spelling

certain

stuff like using their phones, going on social media, or maybe just simply using the remote control. With the help of young

adults

now they're able to do

such

stuff. Younger

adults

can be

healpfull

Correct your spelling

helpful

to them in so many ways. One huge example is the younger

adults

volunteering in nursing homes. In conclusion, I believe that it is an advantage ,that the number of younger

people

is large, to the community, the country, and

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the elderly themselves.

For example

, giving the elderly a chance to retire and a chance for the younger

adults

to find more job

appurtunities

Correct your spelling

opportunities

Submitted by linamazenaytah on Sat Sep 07 2024

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coherence cohesion

Work on the logical structure of your essay. Ensure that each paragraph flows logically into the next, with clear transitions between ideas.

task achievement

Pay attention to grammatical errors and spelling mistakes. Even minor inaccuracies can detract from the overall clarity of your response.

task achievement

Use more specific examples to back up your points. This will strengthen your arguments and demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.

coherence cohesion

You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which provide a solid framework for your essay.

task achievement

Your essay covers both sides of the argument, showing a balanced view on the topic.

task achievement

You provide relevant points about the advantages of having a younger population and their positive impact on the community.

Your opinion

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If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

242 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

demographic shift
age distribution
economic development
productivity
workforce
healthcare infrastructure
maternity and childcare
education sector
vocational training
social dynamism
dependency ratio
social support systems
urbanization
infrastructure
cultural trends
generational conflicts

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At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults compared with the number of older people. Do the advantage outweigh the disadvantage?

Your opinion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some university students wan to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays, many families move overseas for job opportunities. Some people think it is beneficial for the children of these families. While others think children will find it difficult. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In recent years, the number of crimes comitted by young people in majoe cities throughout the world is increasing. discuss this issue. give reasons and suggest some solutions.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driveless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driveless vehicles outwigh the disadvantages?