Social media helps people to keep in touch with friends and stay on top of news and events. Do you think the advantages of social media outweigh the disadvantages? topic in blood?
Social
media
has been helping people
to keep in touch with friends and relatives, also
stay up-to-date Correct word choice
and also
of
Change preposition
with
latest
Correct article usage
the latest
news
and events. Thus
, I believe that Correct article usage
the benefit
benefit
of social Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
media
outweigh Correct article usage
the drawback
drawback
.
Users of social Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
media
can be
straighten relationships with other Unnecessary verb
apply
peope
even when they are far away. Social Correct your spelling
people
media
provides a room for chatting and calling, so people
can be
easily Unnecessary verb
apply
to
interact Fix the infinitive
apply
each
other in different areas. Change preposition
with each
By contrast
, in the previous eras
before Add a comma
eras,
people
invented a platform namely social media
, to build relations, people
had to travel directly to the places where their families or friends shattled. Yet, nowadays humans can see each other through video call
regardless Fix the agreement mistake
calls
distance
. It is a piece of evidence that sophisticated technology brings a Change preposition
of distance
positif
Correct your spelling
positive
efect
to Correct your spelling
effect
people
.
However
, the development of social media
is also
followed by increasing a
risk of false information. It happens because Correct article usage
the
people
tend to spread a piece of information without searching the reliability. It can be seen in Whatsapp groups, for instance
, where hoax news
can be easily found and shared by people
. It causes many users eventually
Fix the infinitive
to eventually
relied
on Wrong verb form
rely
these
fake Correct determiner usage
this
of
Change preposition
apply
news
. To solve this
issue, people
have to be more careful when reading or watching news
. Add an article
the news
In addition
, individuals therefore
need to develop their digital literacy skills so that they can scan and differ
true or false Replace the word
differentiate
news
.
In conclusion, even though there is a risk of spreading hoax information, but
Change preposition
apply
this
issue can be tackled through increasing digital literacy skills. I believe that straighten
relationships are more valuable and become the biggest reason why Wrong verb form
straightened
positive
side of social Correct article usage
the positive
media
outweigh
Correct subject-verb agreement
outweighs
negative
Correct article usage
the negative
effect
.Fix the agreement mistake
effects
Submitted by hikmanurdin04 on
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introduction
While your introduction addresses the topic and presents your viewpoint, it would benefit from clearer structure and slightly more detailed explanation of the points to be discussed. Consider mentioning the key advantages and a potential downside you will address.
supporting main points
Ensure that arguments are clearly delineated and supported by more specific examples throughout the essay. This adds depth and detail to your points.
coherence and cohesion
Try to improve the fluency and accuracy of your writing. This can be achieved by reading more English texts, practicing writing regularly, and reviewing grammar rules.
conclusion
Bring more elaboration in your conclusion to summarize all main points effectively. Restate the main argument and why, despite the drawbacks, you believe the advantages outweigh these.
coherence and cohesion
You effectively highlight the advantage of keeping in touch with family and friends through social media, supported by specific examples like video calls.
logical structure
The essay has clear sections: an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
You address the potential drawback of false information, which shows a balanced view.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.