The provided table illustrates the figure of income and allocating on diet and clothes and the pie charts show the spending of allocating by family in a particular city in the United Kingdom between 2010 and 2013. The units are measured by poundsterling.

The provided table illustrates the figure of income and allocating on diet and clothes and the pie charts show the spending of allocating by family in a particular city in the United Kingdom between 2010 and 2013. The units are measured by poundsterling.
The table shows the total
income
and the total expenditure on food and
clothes
in 2010 and 2013. Meanwhile, the pie illustrates the
detail
Replace the word
detailed
show examples
allocation of family
spend
Wrong verb form
spending
show examples
on
foods
Fix the agreement mistake
food
show examples
and
clothes
in a particular city in the United Kingdom (UK) in the same period.
Overall
, the total
income
decreased but the spend had a slight
increased
Replace the word
increase
show examples
with some changes
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
their
spend
Replace the word
spending
show examples
allocation.
Firstly
, the total
income
of
family
Add an article
a family
the family
show examples
in the UK was 29 thousand pounds in 2010
then
it decreased by 4
thousands
Change to singular
thousand
show examples
in the next 3 years.
In contrast
, the total
income
slightly increased from 14
thousands
Change to singular
thousand
show examples
in 2010 to 15
thousands
Change to singular
thousand
show examples
poundsterling
Correct your spelling
pound sterling
in 2013. Looking at the
detail
Fix the agreement mistake
details
show examples
of the expenditure proportion, meat and fish had the biggest proportion in a family expense with a quarter of the
overall
expenditure in 2010, followed by
clothes
, and fruit and vegetables, with 22% and 20%, respectively. Afterwards, the allocation of fruits and vegetables rose massively
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
35% in 2013.
However
, the proportion of meat
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
fish, and
clothes
declined quite a lot, with not more than a third if combined.
Submitted by bhaswarawira on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
Vocabulary: Replace the words income, clothes with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: