IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

Some people think it’s better to choose friends who always have the same opinions as them. Other people believe it’s good to have friends who sometimes disagree with them. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

#people #it’s #friends
Whilst some people tend to believe that friendship where a debate or a conflict never happens
due to
 the same opinions of the
friends
 is good, I believe that having mates with different perspectives on a topic expands the horizon and develops critical thinking. On the one hand, if
friends
 see the problem
similarly
, the conflicts and debates that can ruin the
friedship
Correct your spelling
friendship
 happen rarer or even do not occur. A tremendous number of people divorce or cease talking
as a result
 of different
outlook
Fix the agreement mistake
outlooks
show examples
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the world or a situation. Psychologists and sociologists proved that people have a tendency to be
friends
 with humans
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 have nearly similar perspectives
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
. Same opinions build more stable relationships with
friends
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 since they will feel more connected to each other.
However
, having someone with different perspectives and outlook as a friend is more interesting, and it expands the thoughts of individuals. Together fellows can look at the situation from different angles, which
improve
Correct subject-verb agreement
improves
show examples
 their judgment and critical thinking. By debating and proving each perspective, it is easier to think about the argument more
comprehesively
Correct your spelling
comprehensively
.
Moreover
, one of the
friends
 can change their opinion and gain knowledge from another perspective. In conclusion, I agree that
debate
Wrong verb form
debating
show examples
 with
friends
 is useful for developing skills,
such
 as critical and comprehensive thinking.
Submitted by IELTS nis on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
To achieve a higher band score, aim to expand on your points with more specific examples or scenarios. This will strengthen your arguments and make them more compelling.
coherence cohesion
Work on refining your sentences for better clarity and grammatical accuracy. Varying your sentence structures can also help improve readability and flow.
coherence cohesion
Try to use a wider range of vocabulary and more advanced language structures to express your ideas. This will make your essay more engaging and leave a positive impression.
task achievement
Your essay does a good job of covering both viewpoints on the topic, which is essential for a well-balanced discussion.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clear and appropriately summarize your argument and opinion, providing a good structure for your essay.
task achievement
Your essay shows a genuine effort to engage with the topic and provide a thoughtful discussion, which is commendable.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • harmonious
  • stress-free
  • disagreements
  • conflicts
  • reinforce
  • validate
  • comforting
  • reassuring
  • broaden your understanding
  • perspectives
  • challenge intellectually
  • think critically
  • personal growth
  • development
  • healthy debates
  • communication skills
  • mutual respect
What to do next:
Look at other essays: