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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows estimated world literacy rates by region and by gender for the year 2000. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information below.

The chart below shows estimated world literacy rates by region and by gender for the year 2000. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information below.
#world #literacy #rates #region #gender #year #report #university #lecturer #information
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The graph illustrates the world literacy
rates
Use synonyms
by
Change preposition
in
show examples
 six different
region
Change to a plural noun
regions
show examples
 between
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
 and
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
 in 2000. World literacy
rates
Use synonyms
 show a significant gap between Sub-Saharan Africa, Arab States, and South
Asia
Use synonyms
 with another three regions both in two genders. People in that
areas
Fix the agreement mistake
area
show examples
 are likely to have
an
Change the article
the
show examples
 initiative to read books or
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
 literature sources.
For instance
Linking Words
, roughly 55 per 100 female individuals in South East
Asia
Use synonyms
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 habits for reading,
while
Linking Words
 over 30%
men
Change preposition
of men
show examples
also
Linking Words
has does too
Wrong verb form
have to
show examples
.
Same
Change the article
The same
show examples
 pattern applied for
Sub-Sahabaran
Correct your spelling
Sub-Saharan
 Africa and Arab States
rates
Use synonyms
 that
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 a proportion
slighty
Correct your spelling
slightly
 under.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
developed
Change preposition
in developed
show examples
 countries people almost
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 no feeling
to read
Change preposition
about reading
show examples
 something.
Meanwhile
Add a comma
Meanwhile,
show examples
 in Latin America and East
Asia
Use synonyms
, the literacy
rates
Use synonyms
 approach almost 10% for each gender, except
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 East
Asia
Use synonyms
. Women in East
Asia
Use synonyms
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
a doubling
Correct the article-noun agreement
a doubling rate
doubling rates
show examples
rates
Use synonyms
 from men in East
Asia
Use synonyms
 in reading
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
text
rates
Use synonyms
.
Also
Linking Words
, the data shows women
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 more ability and feeling to get
a new information
Remove the article
new information
a piece of new information
show examples
 from reading something.
Submitted by rasyidrahma13 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words rates, asia with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • literacy rates
  • gender gap
  • regional disparities
  • socio-economic factors
  • male literacy
  • female literacy
  • overviews
  • notable differences
  • highest literacy regions
  • moderate literacy regions
  • lowest literacy regions
  • estimated data
  • educational attainment
  • cultural influences
  • development levels
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