The shortage of housing in big cities can cause severe consequences. Only goverment action can solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The shortage of housing in megacities has been a subject of national
concerns
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concern
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and can
results
Change the verb form
result
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in severe consequences. From
this
aspect, questions about whether only
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
action can address
this
Correct determiner usage
these
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issues are raised. In my opinion,
governmental
Add an article
the governmental
a governmental
show examples
solution is effective to some extent. Evidently, governments can deal with wasted
lands
Fix the agreement mistake
land
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in cities .
This
is because they are able to develop more residential areas.
This
undoubtedely
Correct your spelling
undoubtedly
leads to the vitalisation of
urban
Correct article usage
the urban
show examples
economy and
this
in turn leads
citisens
Correct your spelling
citizens
to actively maintain their life.
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task achievement
Improve the introduction by clearly stating your position on whether you agree or disagree with the statement. This will make your essay more focused.
task achievement
Elaborate more on your main points to provide stronger support and provide relevant examples. This will make your arguments more convincing and comprehensive.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that your ideas flow logically from one to another. This will improve the coherence and cohesion of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Add a conclusion to summarize your main points and restate your position. This will strengthen the structure of your essay.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear main idea about governmental action potentially addressing housing shortages.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a logical structure, starting with an introduction and moving to a body paragraph with a clear main idea.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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