Social media has become a very effective method of communication. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on the individual and society. Do the advantages of social media outweigh the disadvantages?
social
media
has crucial
effect Add an article
a crucial
the crucial
to communicate
Change preposition
on communicating
for
people, but at the same Change preposition
with
time
, some people worry about its influence for
the person and Change preposition
on
society
. In my opinion, the disadvantages outweigh the advantages about
Change preposition
of
this
issue. Although
there are some good impact
, using social Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
media
to communicate is risky for some individuals, especially children
.
Regarding Correct article usage
the advantage
advantage
Fix the agreement mistake
advantages
to
Change preposition
of using
use
social media
, there are good aspects for us. Firstly
, we can make new friends through message
. Fix the agreement mistake
messages
Moreover
, we can know many types of information easily. I assert that this
means make
us more Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
intelligence
and our visual space may spread by using social Replace the word
intelligent
media
.
However
, I argue that the disadvantages of using social media
overtake the advantages, because of Correct article usage
the risk
risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks
to
Change preposition
of using
use
it. I think children
cannot use
social media
effectively and correctly, so in our world, something big crime
is occurred
through social Change to the active voice
occurs
has occurred
media
between children
and adults, especially sexual crime
. I argue that if children
who do not know how we can use
social media
correctly use
it over time
, we cannot eliminate those types of crime
. Furthermore
, even adults
, it is difficult to Change preposition
for adults
use
social media
effectively, because there are
some wrong information. Change the verb form
is
Thus
for individuals, the issue to
Change preposition
of using
use
it is increased by using uncorrectively
over Correct pronoun usage
it uncorrectively
time
. Additionally
, related to society
, if there are
not correct information and it Change the verb form
is
was
spread by many people, Wrong verb form
is
this
may influence to
Change preposition
apply
society
. I believe that it makes our world much deficits
.
In conclusion, Correct quantifier usage
more deficits
although
there are many positive aspects to use
social Wrong verb form
using
media
, I assert that negative
aspects outweigh the positive Correct article usage
the negative
it
Correct pronoun usage
ones
,
because the Remove the comma
apply
crime
used by social media
is
increased over Verb problem
has
time
and it will be grew
in the future until we regulate the usage of social Change the verb form
grow
media
. Thus
I think we should think how
we can stop Change preposition
about how
crime
by
social Change preposition
through
media
and we
Correct pronoun usage
apply
use
it correct
and effectively for both us and Change the word
correctly
society
.Submitted by kanchanakularathna1991 on
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task achievement
Try to provide more relevant and specific examples to support your points. This will make your arguments stronger and more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Work on your logical structure. Ensure that your essay flows smoothly from one idea to the next and that each paragraph transitions naturally.
task achievement
The essay addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of social media, showing a balanced consideration of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The use of phrases like 'in my opinion' and 'I argue that' helps in emphasizing personal viewpoints.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example