Creative artists should always be given the freedom to express their own ideas in words, pictures, music, or film, in whichever way they wish. There should be no government restrictions on what they do. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this option?

#artists #freedom #pictures #music #film #government #restrictions #option

Creative artists should always be given the freedom to express their own

ideas

in words, pictures, music, or film, in whichever way they wish. There should be no government restrictions on what they do. I totally agree with

this

statement. Nowadays, most artists and content makers are forced to be limited in their opportunities and creations.

However

, our time vice verse needed to

such

creative people, business

ideas

, inspire-motivators and modern art coaches are some of the most wanted at the recent markets. People who dedicate their whole lives to their own

ideas

, pictures, music and films are not to be restricted by the government only because of the high danger coefficient.

Moreover

such

people never reject and neglect their lovely business and will not be disappointed with them

due to

their full understanding of the perfection of those

ideas

Submitted by berlinastanalll on Mon Sep 09 2024

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task achievement

Your essay starts well by stating your position clearly, but it needs more detailed examples to fully support your argument. Consider including specific cases or examples of artists who have benefitted from freedom of expression.

task achievement

Try to elaborate your main points further. For instance, you mentioned that government restrictions can stifle creativity, but providing examples or citing incidents can strengthen your argument significantly.

coherence cohesion

Your essay would benefit from a clearer logical structure. Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that these ideas flow logically from one to the next. Transitions between paragraphs can help the reader follow your argument more easily.

coherence cohesion

A strong conclusion would help to reinforce your argument. Summarise your main points and restate your position to leave a lasting impression.

task achievement

Your introduction is clear and directly addresses the topic, setting up your argument effectively.

task achievement

The essay covers relevant points regarding the importance of creative freedom and how government restrictions could negatively impact artists.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

2 paragraphs

140 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Creative artists should always be given the freedom to express their own ideas in words, pictures, music, or film, in whichever way they wish. There should be no government restrictions on what they do. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this option?

Include an introduction and conclusion

International travel is becoming cheaper and counties are opening doors to more and more tourist do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages

Many children these days have an unhealthy lifestyle. Both school and parents are responsible for solving this problem. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

In some countries, the difference in age between parents and children is generally greater than it was in the past. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Today, more and more people want things instantly (e.g: goods, service, news). Why is this? Is it positive or negative development?