IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The plans below show a harbour in 2000 and how it looks today.

#plans #show #harbour
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The given two maps illustrate
main
Correct article usage
the main
show examples
 changes that have taken place in
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
porth
Correct your spelling
port
harbour
Use synonyms
 between 2000 and today.
Overall
Linking Words
, what stands out from both maps is that the
harbour
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 has become far more developed and modern, with more accommodations. In detail, if we look at the west of the
harbour
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,
one
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 change has been that the showers and toilets were added.
Then
Linking Words
,
one
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 of the key changes is that the places of the Marina with private yachts and fishing boats have changed. In 2000, there was only
one
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 dock for passenger ferries, but
then
Linking Words
 a new
one
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has been
Wrong verb form
was
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 erected in the north of the city during
this
Linking Words
 period.  Regarding the south of the
porth
Change the capitalization
Porth
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harbour
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, new cafes and shops have been constructed next to the lifeboat.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
one
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 of the main developments is that the hotel has been built
instead
Linking Words
 of a castle, the reason for
this
Linking Words
 is that the castle was disused for many years.
Firstly
Linking Words
, in 2000, the public beach was for all tourists,
however
Linking Words
,
then
Linking Words
 it was changed to private and it was only used for visitors
of
Change preposition
to
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 the hotel.
Submitted by bizhanalikhan6 on

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task achievement
Your response thoroughly discusses the main changes in the harbour from 2000 to today. However, to achieve a higher score, try to include more specific details and examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains a good overall structure but can benefit from clearer paragraphing. Ensure each paragraph has its own distinct main idea to improve logical flow.
task achievement
Your overview paragraph effectively summarizes the main changes in the harbour.
coherence cohesion
You have included an introduction and a conclusion, which helps provide a complete response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • multi-purpose building
  • recreational facilities
  • maritime safety
  • leisure destination
  • tourism-focused
  • infrastructure improvements
  • pedestrian promenade
  • landmark
  • expanded roads
  • transport infrastructure
  • industrial use
  • cruise ship terminal
What to do next:
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