IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

32.The chart below shows women aged from 16 to 25 in particular country who prefer to watch or participate in a variety of sports. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

32.The chart below shows women aged from 16 to 25 in particular country who prefer to watch or participate in a variety of sports. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
#women #country #variety #sports #information #features #comparisons
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The bar graph illustrates
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the females
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females
Change the noun form
female
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group
Use synonyms
age
Wrong verb form
aged
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 from 16 to 25 who took part in different sports (
tennis
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,
baksetball
Correct your spelling
basketball
, athletics, badminton, golf and horse riding and racing ) in
certain
Add an article
a certain
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country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
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 in 2000
,
Remove the comma
apply
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and
compred
Correct your spelling
compared
 to
women
Use synonyms
 who liked to watch.
Overall
Linking Words
, the percentage of
women
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 who
preferd
Correct your spelling
preferred
prefer
 to watch was the highest in
tennis
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,
while
Linking Words
 the highest
number
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 of players was in both
tennis
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 and golf. The significant feature was the
number
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 of
women
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 who took part in horse riding and racing was double the
number
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 of
females
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 who watched. There was a significant increase
between
Change preposition
in
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 the
number
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 of
women
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 who watched
tennis
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 sport and others who played ( 30 and 50 respectively).
While
Linking Words
 the
number
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 of
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females
Change the noun form
female
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 players in golf was more than
other
Change the wording
another group
other groups
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group
Use synonyms
 (30 to only 10 respectively).
Similarly
Linking Words
, the figure of
women
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 who participated in horse riding was higher than the second
group
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 ( around 20 and below 10 respectively).
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
females
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 took part in basketball and athletics at around 20, which was greater than the
number
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 of people who watched was around 10. The
number
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 of ladies who
involved
Add a missing verb
were involved
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 in badminton was higher than
other
Change the wording
another group
other groups
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group
Use synonyms
 ( above 10 and under 5 respectively)
Submitted by saja.alotaibi on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words females, group, tennis, women, number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 7 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • participation rate
  • popularity
  • preference
  • trend
  • compare
  • contrast
  • notable differences
  • cultural factors
  • social influences
  • predict
  • data
  • evident
  • sporting activities
  • age group
  • demographic
  • engage in sports
  • viewership
  • spectators
  • gender-specific trends
  • analyze
  • summarize
  • percentage
  • notable
  • significant
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