IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart below shows the numbers of men and women attending various evening courses at an adult education centre in the year 2009. The pie chart gives information about the ages of these course participants. Write a report for a university, lecturer describing the information shown below. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the numbers of men and women attending various evening courses at an adult education centre in the year 2009. The pie chart gives information about the ages of these course participants. Write a report for a university, lecturer describing the information shown below. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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The supplied
bart
Correct your spelling
bar
 chart indicates how many men and
women
Use synonyms
 participated
different
Change preposition
in different
show examples
 afternoon courses at an adult
education
Use synonyms
institue
Correct your spelling
institute
 in 2009.
Moreover
Linking Words
,the provided pie chart illustrates data about how old were these
people
Use synonyms
. It can be clearly seen that the highest
number
Use synonyms
 of
participants
Use synonyms
 were
women
Use synonyms
 who attended
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the language course.
However
Linking Words
,
women
Use synonyms
 did not prefer to learn sculpture in these courses.
In addition
Linking Words
,the highest
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who attended
in
Correct your spelling
an
show examples
education
Use synonyms
 centre was over 50
years
Use synonyms
 old in 2009. In 2009,precisely 40
women
Use synonyms
 decided to take up the language course (which was the highest
number
Use synonyms
 of
participants
Use synonyms
 over the period),compared to the
number
Use synonyms
 of
women
Use synonyms
 who chose to learn painting at exactly 30
people
Use synonyms
 in 2009.
Additionally
Linking Words
,%42 of
Use synonyms
participants
Correct article usage
the participants
show examples
 were more than 50
years
Use synonyms
 old.(Which was the highest percentage of
people
Use synonyms
 who attended over the whole year).
In contrast
Linking Words
,the
number
Use synonyms
 of men who participated in drama
course
Fix the agreement mistake
courses
show examples
 were the same as men in sculpture classes at 10
people
Use synonyms
,just ahead of
women
Use synonyms
 who liked to learn sculpture at roughly 5
people
Use synonyms
 in 2009.(Which was the least
number
Use synonyms
 of
participants
Use synonyms
 over the period).Surprisingly,the percentage of
people
Use synonyms
 who were between 20 and 29
years
Use synonyms
 old and attended
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the adult
education
Use synonyms
 centre was a bit the same as
people
Use synonyms
 under 20
years
Use synonyms
 old at %11 and %5,respectively.(Which were the lowest percentage of ages in
education
Use synonyms
 courses over the whole year).

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words women, education, people, number, participants, years with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 6 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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