IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

Being able to speak a foreign language is an advantage these days. Some people think that children should start learning a foreign language at primary school, while others think children should begin in secondary school. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

#language #advantage #people #children #school
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These days, people prefer to speak in
foreign
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a foreign
show examples
language
 than their mother tongue. They believe that being able to speak in foreign
language
 can bring success in their lives. Some people believe that foreign
language
 should be learned by children at their primary school
level
.
However
, others believe that children should start learning it in secondary school. I personally believe that the best time to learn
foreign
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a foreign
show examples
language
 is primary
level
. Because students at that stage can become very serious, and they can give
full
Correct pronoun usage
their full
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 attention
in
Change preposition
to
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 learning.
This
 essay will discuss
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
both sides and provide
personal
Add an article
a personal
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 opinion. Foreign
language
Fix the agreement mistake
languages
show examples
 can help students in many ways. If they start learning
language
Add an article
the language
a language
show examples
 at
primary
Correct article usage
the primary
show examples
level
, they can easily learn, memorize and understand the vocabulary and
grammer
Correct your spelling
grammar
 of that foreign
language
. When children grow as
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
adult
Fix the agreement mistake
adults
show examples
, their cognitive capability
of learning
Change preposition
to learn
show examples
 any foreign
language
 deteriorates.
Therefore
, it is not possible for them to follow the rules of learning a new
language
.
Threfore
Correct your spelling
Therefore
, I believe that learning
language
Add an article
a language
show examples
 should be started at
primary
Correct article usage
the primary
show examples
level
.
Submitted by rahman_rehana on

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task achievement
Ensure your essay covers both sides of the argument more comprehensively. Currently, the essay predominantly supports starting at primary level, with little discussion on the benefits of starting at secondary school.
coherence cohesion
Strengthen your conclusion by summarizing both sides of the argument and restating your opinion. This adds to the cohesion and leaves a strong final impression.
task achievement
Provide specific examples or studies that support your main points. This would make your argument more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Work on making your introduction and conclusion more distinct and structured. Clearly divide the discussion and the concluding remarks.
coherence cohesion
Proofread your essay to catch any minor grammatical errors and improve overall readability.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear argument supporting the learning of foreign languages at an early stage, which is articulated well.
task achievement
The points about cognitive development and ease of learning at a younger age are well made and relevant to the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cognitive development
  • globalized world
  • language acquisition
  • pronunciation
  • critical thinking
  • culturally aware
  • language interference
  • motivated approach
  • curriculum demands
  • natural learning abilities
What to do next:
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